My first one, where do I begin.  

Danmc3179339 55M
5 posts
11/20/2005 12:23 am

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

My first one, where do I begin.

I was born a poor... Been done. how about some truth.

She said, I Don't Love you and I never have.

I said, "Excuse me, could ya say that again."

She replied, "You heard me correctly, I don't love you and I never have."

I was dumbfounded, confused, angry. My heart had been ripped from my body and it was on our bed pumping my life away.

I finally asked, almost whispering, "Then why did you marry me?"
I paused I didn't know what do. We had been married since September of 1982 and this was December 19, 2001. We have two great kids. We waited six year before having our first child. We waited another five years before our second child and now just days before Christmas she says "I have never loved you"

You see I have always had a confidence problem when it comes to women. I'm short, 5'8. I have always been heavy. But when I got married I had lost a bunch of weight. Down to 180 from 235 in 1982. Now in 2001 I had just lost a bunch more weight after letting it go for many years. I was back down to 180.

She said what she said and I was going to stick it out, until my youngest son graduated high school. That was Dec 19, 2001.

But A sound kept ringing in my ear. It kept pounding in my head. "I never loved you."

You know, I can not remember her answer. But I hear the ringing of that bell. "NEVER LOVED YOU."

So, after three and a half years I have moved out. But I didn't move out first. She started spending more and more nights at her parents house until she finally never came home. I got tired of calling and asking her to come home. So, my mom had an empty Mobile Home. So that's where I live now.

I would like to start seeing other women now. But I'm old now. I'm 44. Getting a little grey.

I don't know how to do this. But I love to try again. Get back in the game the coach said. Just please don't tell me you love me. I don't know if I can trust. Maybe someday.

The Morning Radio Man.
Doing it in the Morning.

rm_DaphneR 58F
7938 posts
11/20/2005 2:02 am

Good lord. It's been a rough night and then I come and read your blog. I'm not going to sugar coat anything so excuse my candor. Fuck that bitch. Live your life for you hon, don't worry about her or what she thinks. You're out and you're better off. Getting back into the whole non-married world isn't going to be easy and will take a lot of perserverance, but do me one favor. Try your hardest not to lump all women into one category because of the way she treated you. Each person is different and should be given the opportunity to prove themselves to be an ass on their own without being prejudged. Oh, and don't build those walls around your heart up too high becuase they are a hell of a lot harder to tear down than they are to put up.

Best wishes and sorry for the late night tirade.

Have tongue, will use it. Repeatedly.

rm_DaphneR 58F
7938 posts
11/20/2005 2:07 am

Heh, clicked on your profile after my first comment. Had no clue until then that you were in New Mexico. I usually scan through the new blogs and pick one or two to read and the little arrow landed on you tonight. Welcome to BlogLand. Stop by and see me sometimes at [blog daphner]

Have tongue, will use it. Repeatedly.

rm_PurryKitty2 48M/50F
9753 posts
11/20/2005 4:53 am


44 is not old!!! Get back out in the game sweetie.....I feel for you and she was a real bitch to have said that to you.....I hope you still dont talk to her......

Keep your chin up and as long as you are honest and be yourself, Mrs. Right will come along....



rm_lickmepretty 51F
851 posts
11/21/2005 3:36 am

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