My Dog Can Burp...  

DTduzDallas 50F
1574 posts
12/8/2005 12:52 pm

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

My Dog Can Burp...

...and other Interesting facts I learned on my recent trip.

Mood: I can laugh about it now.
Music: Scanning for weather reports.

1. I am not above paying more for a cup of coffee than my entire meal cost. I usually scoff at those who frequent that big name coffeehouse, paying outrageous prices for a mediocre cup of java. But, this was an emergency situation...

2. Bourbon mixes nicely with a steaming cup of caramel macchiato. See # 1.

3. My dog can burp. I'm not sure what caused him to do so, but out it roared. He hadn't eaten anything out of the ordinary. Not yet, anyway...

4. A dog will pass gas after consuming his first quarter pounder and supersize fry. Lots of it. Someone call W. I found the nation's answer to weapons of mass destruction.

5. It's not "cool" to drop the windows to air out the vehicle doing 80 mph down I-30 in a 22 degree mix of rain, sleet, and snow. Not cool at all. Just damn cold.

6. It's not ok for my assistant to attempt to cuddle my "horsedog" during a deep sleep.

7. My dog has big teeth and will use them. See # 6.

8. If you attempt to alleviate body fluids on the side of the road due to lack of proper available facilities, someone WILL see you no matter how hard you try to conceal your activity. Then they'll honk, making sure the attention of other motorist's are directed your way.

9. I'm not the best traveling companion when the driver has made me pissy for the past 4 days and has suddenly decided to make pleasant conversation.

Driver: "What are you writing?"
DT: "Stuff." (spoken like a well-educated, 39 y/o)
Driver: "May I read some of it later?"
DT: "Sure, but you might want to skip over the derogatory comments about you. Then again, if you do that, there'll be nothing left to read."
Driver: "Real funny."
DT: "Is there a pearly-white smile emitting rays of sunshine over here?"
Driver: "Are you going to be like this the whole trip?"
DT: "I'll probably get worse at some point. Just leave me alone and let me write."
Driver: **raises voice** "Oh, c'mon!"
DT: **screams** "Don't raise your voice at me! Sit over there and drive and quit talking to me. Don't say another word. Enjoy the damn silence!"
**alarmed dog begins to bark...groggy assistant shouts at dog to shut-up**

10. Never say "things can't get any worse."

They will.

By the way, the 9 hour, 54 minute trip took approximately 12 hours with 3 stops along the way. Could've been worse. We could've eatin Mexican.


barbiebunny 36F
5597 posts
12/8/2005 2:55 pm

DT,
Time to send your boys to Cabana BOy Finishing school after the 1st ...this is rediculous princess.

Its good to be...ME


DTduzDallas 50F

12/8/2005 5:46 pm

    Quoting wetpantyslut2:
    ahhhh, the joys of owning a dog. Somebody "bitch" slap your driver. lol

    wetty
lmao I'm not about to slap him...I know better. BIG Italian guy. Hey, I didn't have to drive...that's all that matters now. lol


DTduzDallas 50F

12/8/2005 5:47 pm

    Quoting barbiebunny:
    DT,
    Time to send your boys to Cabana BOy Finishing school after the 1st ...this is rediculous princess.
Bunz...does that include the dog? Please tell me it includes the dog...


DTduzDallas 50F

12/8/2005 5:49 pm

    Quoting travelingintexas:
    LOL That doent seem to out of the oridinary to me where you are concerned lol
*****bitchslap******** you're right, some things never change


Kimmers777 106F

12/8/2005 6:05 pm

Sounds like you were traveling in the dearest of company. And don't discount the Mexican food. It does wonders for the dog AND your driver!


DTduzDallas 50F

12/8/2005 6:26 pm

lmao Kimmers...I never thought about it that way. Bet I make a return trip to the grocery now...I'm craving salsa.


redlipsprincess
(Princess Lips)
51F

12/8/2005 7:32 pm

OMG< laughing..thx I needed that

Is that your pup?

I shepards!

TTFN


DTduzDallas 50F

12/8/2005 9:37 pm

    Quoting redlipsprincess:
    OMG< laughing..thx I needed that

    Is that your pup?

    I shepards!
Lips - I swiped someone else's dog...but yes, he looks very much like that one.


redlipsprincess
(Princess Lips)
51F

12/8/2005 11:56 pm

Sheps are the best...

TTFN


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