More Musings From Slurpboy  

2208 posts
9/21/2005 7:15 am

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

More Musings From Slurpboy

Happy Humpday!

When I last left you, our hero said that he was going to conclude the story. The reason? To prove that he is not a joke. (His words, not mine.)

Without further ado, I give you the conclusion of Part I. (There is a Part II and he actually labelled it as such. You'll see.)

When I stopped I was kissing those thighs taking my time and caressing them running my fingers gently across the back of your thigh while sucking and nibbling. I can see the juices flowing out of your pussy while you moan in anticipation of my tongue lapping at it. I know you want me to suck that clit but I just ignore you as you try to push my head between those lips. I fight back the eagerness inside of me to lick you until you cum! I want you to build up more I want it so that when you cum it will last every bit of 10mins. I after I think you`ve had enough I take the tip of my tongue and brush it between those pussy lips as I work my way up to your clit.
The first touch on the head of that clit I want it to be gentle but yet firm like a feather running across it. Just then I hear you let out one of those most distinct moans I have ever heard. I slowly start to work my tongue across that clit back and forth just hitting the nub and with every caress from my tongue your moans become more increased and louder with every stroke. I want to taste that sweet pussy so I work my way down between those sweet pussy lips sucking on them one by one slurping and making my way down to that dripping pussy hole. I methodically start to drink your pussy juices as they spill out of your pussy, sliding this thick ass tongue from your asshole to your pussy hole where I circle around that pussy until your ready for me to slide this long fat tongue inside you. I slide in the tip of my tongue and you start moaning more increasingly then I slide in some more. Now I can really taste the sweetness deep in side of you as I start to lap it up before it runs out of your pussy. I slide my tongue all the way in now and wiggle it around inside and start to tongue fuck you. I go back up to that hard clit and i wrap these lips around it and start stroking it until you scream IM ABOOUUTT TOO CUUUUUUUMMMMMM#%@ and I tell you I want you to cum all in my mouth!! I tell you to sit that sweet pussy on my face. Then I slide this tongue deep inside you as you grind your pussy all over my face I wrap my mouth around your pussy and start rapidly pushing this tongue against your clit Thats when I hear you scream "IM GONNA CUMMM@#! Just then I wrap this mouth around that pussy tight and felt the warmth of your juices fill my mouth as I hastily sucked it all up!

Annnnnd scene.

Sorry, but you know that I'm going to have to share my observations.

1. "I want you to build up more I want it so that when you cum it will last every bit of 10mins."

I'm guessing he keeps a kitchen timer on his bedside table so that he knows when the ten minutes of cumming are up. If his head is down between someone's legs, I'd imagine he'd be too busy to be checking out the digital clock.

2. "...I hear you let out one of those most distinct moans I have ever heard."

Oh yeah? What kind of moan? Is it like the sound you hear when wind blows through a subway station? Perhaps it's the agonized moan that anyone seeing that sentence lets loose after they've read it. So many possibilities...

3. For shits and giggles, I have replaced the word "pussy" with "cactus". Why? Just to be an ass and illustrate the overuse of one word.

I want to taste that sweet cactus so I work my way down between those sweet cactus lips sucking on them one by one slurping and making my way down to that dripping cactus hole. I methodically start to drink your cactus juices as they spill out of your cactus, sliding this thick ass tongue from your asshole to your cactus hole where I circle around that cactus until your ready for me to slide this long fat tongue inside you.

Feel free to substitute "cactus" with a word of your choosing. I'm willing to bet that no matter what word you put in there, the result will be the same - disbelief and nausea.

By the way, how many women out there like to hear her nether regions referred to as a "pussy hole"? Someone? Anyone?

Again with the slurping. Ech.

Oh, and the description of his "thick ass" and "long fat" tongue doesn't turn me on somehow. I just get images of Jabba the Hut in my mind and that grosses me out to no end.

4. I don't like the lines that I've been given in this performance (IM ABOOUUTT TOO CUUUUUUUMMMMMM#%@ and "IM GONNA CUMMM@#!). The writer clearly didn't have me in mind for this role, so I'm quitting.

Maybe a good actress like Madonna or Elizabeth Berkley could pull these lines off, but not I! I will visit the Kraft services table, give this outfit back to wardrobe and then I'll be off. Good day, sir!

(Part II tomorrow. Stay tuned.)

rm_saintlianna 45F
15466 posts
9/21/2005 8:46 am

Annnnnnnd DE-lete, Slurpboy the Amazing Doofus. jeez.

HornyMan_onLI34 46M

9/21/2005 9:00 am

A very funny post, DC. Love the cactus bit. I used 'toe nail' instead of cactus and it gave me a good chuckle. So this is the hell you ladies put up with around here, huh. It could be worse. I don't really know how it could be but hopefully part II will at least be as amusing if not more. Hope he didn't send you pics of that crazy tongue of his. Peace

digdug41 49M

9/21/2005 9:10 am

wow I never realised how rough you gals got it on this site and for all the fucktards that send these e-mails yall got to work on your rappin skills cuz if you dont get no punany in the real orld what makes yall think you gonna get it here with crap like that

roaming the cyber streets of blogland

givingoral4u 46M
1 post
9/21/2005 12:42 pm

You need to stop using my fucking material you f*cki** copycat! Be original!

rm_jayR63 59F
1884 posts
9/21/2005 7:22 pm

You get all the really hot guys!

rm_DaphneR 58F
7938 posts
9/21/2005 10:27 pm

Laugh. God, he's so proud he lays claim to that shit? Probably the only thing he lays ...

Have tongue, will use it. Repeatedly.

Heartnsoul768 52M
360 posts
9/22/2005 6:54 am

After reading the post, and the replies ... I am left gapped mouthed wondering what will be said next. Daphne ... What you said was funny. If we took a vote the "eyes" would have it ... Or should I say the "eye."

1586 posts
9/22/2005 12:48 pm

Saintlianna -

Delete? Oh no. Not yet...

1586 posts
9/22/2005 12:50 pm

HornyMan -

"Toe nail" is an excellent substitution.

"Pineapple" and "teacup" aren't bad either. LOL

1586 posts
9/22/2005 12:51 pm

Digdug -

Maybe these sorts of emails work on some level neither you or I are aware of.

Let's keep it that way, shall we?

1586 posts
9/22/2005 12:52 pm

givingoral -

You sure you want to own up to this?

Really, really sure?

1586 posts
9/22/2005 12:53 pm

jayR -

Just say the word, my friend, and these guys are a forwarded email away...

1586 posts
9/22/2005 12:57 pm

Daphne -

I'd already finished updating my blog before I got back to responding to this particular post.

A situation I'd discusssed about someone else's post just came true on my very own blog!

I think I've recovered from my jaw dropping onto my keyboard.

Maybe I need to write about something more some winning lottery numbers.

1586 posts
9/22/2005 12:58 pm

Humboldthonni -

But deep down you think this stuff is sexy, right? LOL

1586 posts
9/22/2005 1:00 pm

Heartnsoul -

If you thought you were surprised, imagine my shock - particularly in the comments left regarding this post.

Priapeo 46M

9/23/2005 9:06 am

I'm curious to hear how he pronounces the #%@ part.

Never argue with an idiot. He brings you down to his level then beats you with experience

1586 posts
9/25/2005 8:53 am

Priapeo -

I think #%@ is something that only his lovers can hear or understand.

That's why none of us here know what it sounds like.

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