My new theory and my evening with a 21-year-old  

Choozmi 50M
746 posts
5/6/2006 1:50 pm

Last Read:
5/13/2006 10:40 am

My new theory and my evening with a 21-year-old

My new theory: I think people more or less accept that they can't turn back the clock and reverse the aging process, which is why they are so fixated on weight.

Losing weight seems to be a viable alternative to losing years.

I caught myself doing it this morning, looking in the mirror. I was thinking, "If I could drop five or ten pounds, I'd be a better match for this 21-year-old."

How silly does that sound?

Anyway, see my previous post ("New friend") to find out how a young lady on another dating site contacted me about a week ago. We had our first date last night.

Are we compatible? I think so. I'm past that youthful idealism that causes one to ignore faults in a potential partner ("So what if he has a prison record -- deep down he's a poet!") She is certainly pretty and once we got past the initial awkwardness of seeing each other for the first time I really enjoyed her company.

Two things concerned me...

She is very proud of what she knows and shares it at the drop of a hat. She also was quick to correct me if my information about a topic differed from hers. She seemed to dislike the possibility of being wrong.

She teased. At first it was cute but it got annoying after a while. Yes, I'm talking about sexual teasing. We talked about past exploits and she made it clear that she was sexually experienced and adventurous (while she was rubbing my leg under the table at dinner). She made many provocative comments ("Look at that empty field over there! Why, if we went in there you could totally have your way with me!") We held hands and explored each other's bodies a bit through our clothes (quite nice). Yet she was very hesitant to kiss me (all the while claiming she wanted to but "later").

The kissing situation seemed to be her way of controlling the situation in order to keep me interested. I think she got it in her head that if she kisses a man too soon, he ends up not respecting her.

I'm chalking these two things up to her youth and I'm trying to figure out whether I can put up with them or not.

When we were saying good night (me still unkiss'd) I asked if she was attracted to me. She said yes. I said I got the impression that I was boring her and that many men would take a refusal to kiss them as flat rejection. She said she definitely wanted more "stuff" to happen between us in the future.

We'll see what happens. At the moment I'm thinking of giving her a call but all the teasing left a bad taste in my mouth. I really, really hate it when a woman tries to use "tactics" (see Item 7 in my post "How to blow it") to keep me interested. I'm getting too old for that shit. Why can't she just be honest about what she wants and doesn't want?

And, dammit, I scrubbed the shower AND changed my sheets and for what???

rm_PurryKitty2 48M/49F
9753 posts
5/6/2006 2:13 pm

Honey, he is smoking and I bet you are too. Relax and have fun with him. Show him a few tricks that young girls cant do



Choozmi 50M

5/6/2006 2:42 pm

"He"? I'm confused.

Oh, maybe you think the picture posted next to my blog of the guy in the shorts is my date last night?

That's me, all thirty-nine years of me! (I'm straight.)

So I'll take this as a compliment. )

spunkyangel44 52F

5/6/2006 2:47 pm

I think she just likes to be in total control, and was testing waters with you.Someone in her life was a bit controlling and she did not like it.When she hints next time,about the field,go for it.She was telling you then she wanted you.Just staying in control while doing it.

Djeeper1987 47M

5/6/2006 3:06 pm


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