How much is enough for you?  

Choozmi 50M
746 posts
5/28/2006 4:29 am

Last Read:
5/28/2006 6:36 pm

How much is enough for you?

If you have had experiences with multiple lovers per session, what does it take to turn you on? Is one partner at a time enough?

I mean this question sincerely. It doesn't stem from any criticism of group sex or people who engage in it but rather from my own insecurities.

How could a man like me -- limited in my experience with group sessions (only one FMF session in my life and the rest have been one-on-one MF) -- hope to please you in the long run? Does the incredible sensation of many lovers all feeding your desire at once mean that only one lover would bore you?

I've always wondered, "Do I know enough techniques, teases, tricks, and titillations to please a lover and keep her interested in me?"

The short answer is "If she loves you, whatever you do for her -- if you do it with love -- will be enough." I know, I know. But still...

What will satisfy you?

DanaeKC 43F
600 posts
5/28/2006 6:22 am

How much is enough for you, when you are with multiple partners who focus upon you? Do you seek to be pleased within the moment, or are you seeking to have each of them devote themselves to you 24/7?

Are you enjoying yourself, and enjoying each of your partners, for what is? or are you really looking for validation from each of your partners?

Forgive my phrasing, I'm not sure how to word my questions. It's just multiple lovers all at once instead of serially. You enjoy each other, and the moment, for what it is. It isn't a contest to see who can turn a multiple encounter into a one on one encounter. There's too much competition in that, and competition sucks. True competition destroys the vibe, at least it does for me.

Just enjoy each other, every single one, and enjoy enjoying one another, without turning it into a contest of 'who did who better'. you know what I mean? :\

If you're more worried about techniques than about responding to and improvising with the person you are with, you're going to lose out, you're going to stress yourself out, and that's not the point of all this.

Relax. Pay attention to whom you're with. Let go. Have fun. You don't need a chart or a flow chart or a scorecard or (god help) a leader board. Just pay attention.

Hippink 35F
4499 posts
5/28/2006 5:07 pm

For me, having multiple partners at the same time is completely a different thing than one-on-one sex. The extra partners are meerly props. They are used by me & my partner to further our sexual experience, live out a fantasy. It's a sensual sharing, real live, interactive porn.

One partner at a time will ALWAYS be the best sexual experience. The others are just fun in a different way. I am perfectly happy having sex one-on-one... but if asked to never have multiples again... I think that would make me sad. I CAN live without it... but it is something I truely love to do. I crave it sometimes.

If swinging isn't something you really want to do, it's not hard to find a woman who doesn't want to swing, either. Swingers are an extreme minority. You might see a lot of couple's profiles out there... but most of them are just wannabe's. Men pretending their wives know about it, couples who are just fantasizing, etc. There is VERY few true swinging couples. And of those, most only want a single female to join them... usually to live out the MAN's fantasy.

One thing you may have missed... ten men who haven't got a clue what they're doing, or they don't have any kind of real connection with me, aren't going to even come CLOSE to what one man who learns how to push all the right buttons and has a familiarity & connection with me, can do to me.

Truely... quality always beats quantity.
The extras are just for horny porn. It's not for sexual & emotional (which are usually found hand-in-hand esp in women) satisfaction.

For me, a lover keeps me interested just by adoring me, worshipping my body, eagerness to please me.
That's really all it takes.
Hippie XXX

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