musings on monogamy  

CharlieOnTheMTA_ 47F
789 posts
12/10/2005 5:39 am
musings on monogamy

well, hi there blog. sorry it's been a while. i have much to say, but still can't at this point. i'll give it alittle more time, then i think i'll be able to post what i really want to say...and vent. i'm pissed about something but need to wait to let it settle before i let loose.


i'm now a beard. see, my friend, my best friend is involved with a married man. i'm sooo disappointed. in her. and for her assuming that i would cover for her. just because i am liberal and "out there" doesn't mean she should assume that i would take part. but i believe to each their own and i'm not between the sheets with them, or him and his wife so i can't judge. but i can muse on it a bit. from my personal standpoint.

i don't believe in cheating - just read my profile. i adamantly wrote - no married men, don't bother, i won't respond. it's a moral and religious choice (yes, i'm on a sex web site, but i still go to church on sundays lol - life is a contradiction isn't it).

i believe in open marriages. and i know they work, but it's VERY VERY hard. it takes complete trust and we are no longer programed to allow trust in our lives. in our lives that are run by the media - heaven forbid we have a thought, idea or feeling that is our own and that wasn't programed by some mass marketing plan.

i just can't believe that we are to be monogamous for our entire lives. do we really believe that life was simpler and more moralistic in the marriages of the 40's and 50's? i'm sure on some points yes, but i'm just as sure ward cleaver was a little freaky in the office with his secretary - i mean - who could stay away from trying to discover what was under the bullet shaped bra's they wore then?

my parents marriage was saved by their affairs. my sister's marriage is somewhat open. my last relationship was somewhat open. i believe in polyamore, in triads. i believe that once you have that complete trust, once you know that you are the ONLY one for your partner... and by ONLY, i mean emotionally. sometimes sex is a release. sex does not = love. if sex outside the marriage is consensual with your life partner, then go for it. sex over time with the same person gets boring. sometimes you need the outside stimulation. just don't get emotionally involved. don't become the persons confident. don't become their friend. your friend, your best friend, your confident is your wife or husband.

all in a perfect world right? but it's my world, and i've see it happen. i want that. i want my perfect world.... L O L ....

lustmirror 63M
2897 posts
12/13/2005 8:40 pm

There is an expression..."living a lie"
and mostly, it's self-explanatory
...until it becomes you...
living a lie...
that you weren't allowed
to be aware of..................
...and then one day... are...

that's whats at the long end of it

tpb333 42M

12/12/2005 8:36 pm

I agree with your thoughts. I think you have to be honest. If your partner is willing to allow others into your sex life, great. Sneaking around is a lie to yourself and whomever you are involved with.

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