Good Friends  

CelticFlower 50F
1061 posts
3/7/2006 5:51 am

Last Read:
3/28/2006 12:21 pm

Good Friends

In the last few days, its been a bit of an emotional roller coaster ride for me. This morning it just all fell to pieces, in front of a good friend.
So what did she do? She gave me a big hug, which i really needed. Then she sat with me & told me her thoughts, on my present situation.
Firstly......stop having any expectations of my hubby. In relation to me or the kids. He has always been selfish & not the most caring of fathers. So why would that change, now that he & i are separated?
Do not expect him to act like an adult & separate what is between the two of us. With what is between him & the kids.
Let him make his own mistakes with the kids etc. Because if you try to point these out, you are just being nasty towards him.In his eyes, that is.
Finally, stop considering him in your decisions. Make the decisions that are best for you & the boys. You are the stronger, more intelligent half of the of what seemed to be a partnership & you have to keep believing this.
All of this is very true & thoughts i have had, myself over the last few days.I still have problems trusting my judgment but chats like this confirm That my judgement isn`t actually too bad.
Infact my judgement is pretty fantastic, when it comes to choosing friends. That goes for virtual ones as well as Real Life Ones.

Kisses to you all
CF
xxxxx


UnpinAfireFaust 57M

3/7/2006 5:59 am

I've been where your going (and in some ways am still there) Celtic, so can relate. It won't be easy from some of the things you have said and for that, I'm sorry. But you have a lot of good friends around you to turn to for help and advice. Don't be afraid to use us. As for the advice already given you...it sounded good to me.


GoddessOfTheDawn 105F
11240 posts
3/7/2006 6:12 am

~hugz~


sassybelle21 32F
13313 posts
3/7/2006 7:02 am

Hey there If I was there, I'd give you a big hug too. Just keep your chin up. You have to be strong for the kids


dutchpete 54M
563 posts
3/7/2006 8:34 am

Knowing you a bit longer now, even before the Celtic Flower, I can say that you deserve the hug.

Yr friend wise advise should be like on a small tile for your smallest room.

It's your life, now or ever.

Hope the judgement of this wonderful flower keeps on being the same and that virtual friends will be there, including this strange dutchie, will give you push forward for the new life.

XxX


CelticFlower 50F

3/7/2006 8:48 am

Cannon..........thank you for your wise words , as always...kisses
Goddess......thank you for the hugs, i`ll save them for another needy day.
Blue Eyes........danke fur was du geschrieben hastxxxx
Pete.......celtic has come a long way from her 746 beginnings. You are a true friend. A hug from me to you.


GangBangCple 66M/55F

3/8/2006 1:32 am

Thats very good advise from a good freind ,
accept it , and act on it ,
and Good Luck
gbc


roterteufel24 35M
27 posts
3/9/2006 7:30 am

hallo kleine wie gehts dir würde gerne mich mit dir unterhallten aber dafür würde ich dich gerne einladen zu mir in mein freindeskreis zu kommen bitte melde dich bei mir love and kiss joe


rm_byron1724 53M
214 posts
3/9/2006 9:16 am

Hi Celtic - three pieces of advice given to me by a close friend were: be strong, be happy and don't be a mug, which really helped me through all that indecisive feelings you get when your partner suddenly decides they want to be single again.

Be strong - for yourself, but also for the kids. There's no one else you should be relying on, and we're all a lot stronger than we thing we are.

Be Happy - this is "you" time, time to explore you and what you want without the hassle of some selfish hanger on who wants you to think of his needs. Enjoy your life, enjoy your kids, enjoy being you.

Don't be a mug - when you're emotionally drained you can sometimes give up things or give into demands or just accept impositions put upon you in the hope that either he will change his mind and come back or because you still have feelings for him - its fine to have feelings for him, but don't forget about what YOU want, what YOU need, so don't just roll over whenever he calls, do things for you, not him.

They helped me put things into perspective and my life suddenly because a lot happier and a lot clearer and I felt more alive than I had done in years.

Keep smiling Celtic

Byron xxx


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