Best Friends  

CantonOhCouple 60M/59F
370 posts
2/2/2006 4:12 pm

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

Best Friends

I met my friend one score less two years ago. 18 years now. Almost longer than the latest crop of high school graduates and first time voters who “know everything”. Wish I still did. But someplace along life’s bumpy road the fact that I don’t know “everything” got hammered in. Now I now better, or know less, rather.

I can’t say that we hit it off at first. I can be annoying, and was. We met at work and competed for jobs and status. I lost. Didn’t matter, by then we’d gotten past the macho crap and established a relationship founded on genuine trust and mutual admiration. Or perhaps I’m a little less annoying now. In any event, we found the capacity to overlook our faults and cherish our strengths.

Along the way we learned to communicate. Gut-level, no holds barred, no-shit communication … it served us well on the job, and in our friendship. The misunderstandings, the imagined slights, the backstabbing office gossip … all the perils of pride that doom most friendships … we managed to avoid because when push came to shove … we talked about it.

Good advice for any relationship, especially for people who would be friends.

And did we talk. We talked in meetings; we talked at lunch, at coffee breaks, and at the local bar when the gang got together for drinks. We argued politics, sports; talked about our kids, plotted office strategy, commiserated about spouses, complained about our sex lives … you name it, we talked about it.

After all, that’s what friends do.

We had a pretty big scare recently. C, the big C, in this case malignant melanoma. A mole that looked a little funny. When I got the call, it was like crashing into a tree. Everything, everything stopped while we waited for the consultation with the specialist, the prognosis, the treatment regimen. Waiting for the Oracle to speak. Well not everything stopped, we still talked, but now … as if by some unspoken but iron-clad protocol … we avoided the blue sky long term discussions. Like driving in dense fog we focused on the short term, immediate things. Waiting. Hoping. Praying.

The day came. The diagnosis was Stage 1. The doctor said “In situ … mumble/mumble …treatable … mumble/mumble … curable”. It ain’t over, it’s never over, and it ain’t for 100 percent damn certain, but odds are good, odds are good.

When I got this call on my cell I cried. Broke down while driving, took the next off-ramp, pulled over, put the car in park and plain bawled like a baby cried. Maybe I shouldn’t have worried so much, cared so much, but when your friend, your very best friend, is facing the bullet, it matters! Let me just say that I wasn’t ashamed of the tears that streamed down my face then, or the tears that accompany these words now.

You see, my friend, my very best friend, is also my love, my lover, my partner, my companion, and I am humbled to say, since the day we clasped hands and exchanged home-made hand-written vows while visiting St. Pauls’ cathedral in England on a honest-to-god storybook whirlwind tour, that I am ...

Her best friend.

BullsTardeMeant 56M
837 posts
2/2/2006 8:28 pm


Precious friends. Precious time.
Enbrace all that you have. Embrace all that you hold Holy. Embrace each other again. Embrace us with your grace.

We are here for you.


angelofmercy5 58F
17881 posts
2/2/2006 10:26 pm

Well you I know where you have been. Being a cancer survivor myself...I know what the waiting is like. I'm so very happy that all the new has been good. And this post.....was just beautiful. You two are a very special couple.

rm_unlistedone 65M
2718 posts
2/3/2006 12:51 am

My prayers... my love.... my friends....

Like Angel, now we know. I for one, have worried and wondered.

We will continue our support and love for the both of you....

hug, unlisted

CantonOhCouple 60M/59F
553 posts
2/4/2006 10:42 am

milkit7, thank your for the kind thoughts and words.

angelofmercy5, waiting, wondering, fearing the worst. Please, never again.

unlistedone, thank you for your prayers. We truly appreciate them (and the hug).

Hugs from Us.

CantonOhCouple 60M/59F
553 posts
2/5/2006 2:31 pm

Thank you for your love and support and encouragement and companionship and and and.... I am blessed. So, very blessed to share this wonderful life with you. Until after evermore .....
Your best friend.

rm_g1000man 70M
54 posts
2/11/2006 11:47 am

Well my prayers are with you, thanks for the story...

Lost my wife in two weeks to cancer in 1996 and my son in 1984.

God bless you both.


rm_unlistedone 65M
2718 posts
2/11/2006 11:56 pm

Just thought I would stop in and see how the lady of the blog was doing? And of course, I won't leave out the man of the blog either! The emotions of something like this runs high in all it touches.

Just felt the need to say hello... hope you are doing well.
soft hug, unlisted

CantonOhCouple 60M/59F
553 posts
2/13/2006 4:56 pm

unlistedone, Thank you for the well wishes. We are doing very well. The sun shines brighter, the snow is whiter, and our love is growing by leaps and bounds. It has been the support and encouragement of friends such as yourself who have given us the strength to live every day like non-other. We must vacation in the Carolinas this year!!! Trust all is well with you.

Big hugs!
Mrs. COC

CantonOhCouple 60M/59F
553 posts
2/13/2006 5:04 pm


Thank you so much for your prayers. We are moved by it, especially since your own sorrows touch us so deeply.

God bless you too,

Hugs from us ...

Become a member to create a blog