I Don't Get It  

CandyKissBaby 60F
1919 posts
10/1/2005 11:28 pm

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

I Don't Get It

I really don't understand why a guy loses all interest in sex. Well, he has lost his interest in sex with me. It is hard to take & sure as hell hard to deal with.

How would/do you deal with such a thing?


leyndokona2 49F

10/2/2005 5:23 am

Have you talked to him about it?

rm_cnudigit 56M/51F
279 posts
10/2/2005 6:27 am

Dont know how anyone could resist an ass like yours!! This is not something you "deal" with, its something you take control of!!! Its your mind and your body. You go woman!!

realmom2 58M/50F

10/2/2005 11:17 am

I agree with cnudigit, how could anyone lose interest in you? My husband loves sex, but we don't have it very often at all. I always thought it was me, but, I now know it's not. He hasn't lost interest in me, he just doesn't have the "ability" to perform as he used to. I guess it comes with age. That's why I'm here, (with his blessing od course). He allows me to have all the fun I want, as long as it's only sex, and it is. On the other hand, he's still a great husband and father, and does manage to "cum" thru every once in awhile. In your case, it may not be a lack of interest, it may be a lack of ability, which many men are too embarrased to admit.

sexystud191000 32M

10/2/2005 6:35 pm

this may just be because i'm young but i find it very hard to believe that they lose interest in sex. especially if you are as hot as i keep hearing candykiss.

rm_ffray 51M

10/3/2005 8:16 pm

I guess I could ask the same question about women. When I did bring up the subject, well it was not worth the fight.

IronsFetesSinai 56M
225 posts
10/4/2005 7:20 am

Hi ckb
Have you tried to spice it up with sexy outfit's,toy's,game's,role play ? If those don't work. Hit him over the head with a dildo, knock him out, go out and play!(with me?).
I'm glad i got to see you. Even if only for a few. "pop pop pop"... Hope the family problems are not to overloading for you. Bless you and good luck.


CandyKissBaby 60F

10/5/2005 7:09 am

thanks everyone & i'm sorry... talk about letting my frustration get to me. I'll try not to let that happen again!

after i posted this & read all of your comments, i started thinking i should clarify... my situation is very similair to realmom2. he hasn't lost all interest in sex. he has lost his ability to attain an erection most of the time, but can with medical help. the problem is he won't take the pills very often. he seldom touches me & isn't a very intimate affectionate guy. i have tried talking to him, but he doesn't like to talk about 'his problem'... yes it is his problem, i finally realized after years of beating myself up, thinking it was me & suffering a big blow to my self-esteem.

if you would ask him, he would say it's mostly my fault we don't have sex. why? because i don't give in to him when he requests a blowjob, it's kinda hard (no pun intended, cause he won't 'waste' a pill) & no fun to give a bj when it takes forever to get him semi-hard enough to cum, talk about blowers jaw! he seldom preforms oral on me.

maybe it is my fault we don't have sex... could be, i have lost interest in having sex with him. either way, it is very frustrating. i have tried to spice things up, do them different, bought new toys, games, etc... guess i'm left with hitting him over the head with a dildo


rm_ryan45 59M/50F

10/5/2005 4:55 pm

Hey Darlin....well my wife is on meds for high bp and has lost all interest...and after trying to "fix" things for 3 years (yep 3 years) I decided it wasn't my fault and decided to look elsewhere.... we don't argue anymore because it always ended up being about sex...or lack of it.... marriage is better and I don't bug her any more.... just looking for a woilling partner since mine moved away....

rm_TwiztedCharm 56M
456 posts
10/5/2005 6:03 pm

Don't let it get you down, be honest about wanting, needimg and desirering sex. If you can't get it at home you wont have to look hard for it. It's great to be a woman in a womans world.

CandyKissBaby 60F

10/6/2005 7:07 am

thanks ryan, it's probably been close to 10 years or more for me. when he started having trouble keeping an erection during sex, he wouldn't admit it was his problem & often blamed me. then it got worse, he had trouble getting an erection without lots of hard work, mostly from me. at this point, our marriage was in deep trouble, but we decided to work things out... & he went to the doctor for a physical. they never found any medical reason for his erectile dysfunction, & gave him this new wonder drug called viagra. it worked great & we had lots of fun & good sex... 3 times a week! sure don't get anything near that now! it's been a steady decline for the last few years. what happened?


CandyKissBaby 60F

10/6/2005 7:11 am

thanks twistedcharm, i do try not to let it get to me, but sometimes i can't help it... the frustration just takes its toll. I am honest about wanting, needing & desiring sex, ask the guys i know. why do you think i'm on this sex site? women have the power & rule the world, we just let guys think they do!!! lol


rm_TwiztedCharm 56M
456 posts
10/6/2005 9:18 am

Some of us know better

rm_ffray 51M

10/6/2005 7:32 pm

Candy Kiss that is a true statement if I ever heard one

warmandsexy52 64M
13164 posts
10/8/2005 12:40 am

Candy, perhaps the stress you're facing is something he can't manage, but won't say. I went through something similar as a husband about three months ago. My wife was spending a lot of time at her 90 year old mother's, or worrying about her clinically depressed sister. I thought I could cope, but in truth didn't even realise at the time that I couldn't and wasn't. Eventually I came to terms with where I was and that I needed to be positive in my relationship, including being creative in our sex life together, but that was not before straying a little and having one or two little adventures. Even if he has been a good husband your partner could be going through the same silent crisis.

My best wishes. Hope it all works out. warm xx

rm_adultmusic 60M

10/12/2005 10:24 am

Sweet Candy! I've not written in like forever....as my daughter would say! But I do occasionally look in on you. I'm not sure what your hubby's going through. However my personal experience is this; I've only lost interest in sex under two conditions. One, when I'm depressed (and there is meds for that and they do work, but it comes back to guys that don't admit and/or talk about problems they do have...). Two, when I'm interested in sex, just not interested in her... Awful thing to say, I'm afraid. Good sex is often the result of a good relationship... Now I'm sounding all preach-y, aren't I? I do agree with warmandsexy, that it may be your hubby has alot of emotional shit on his mind and heart....aka depression. But it sounds as though you've been begging for more sex for a long time...and with your personality and your body....you shouldn't have to beg!

Nothing here in the way of solutions, just thoughts....

ps...if you ever need help with your desires...

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