That Elusive Confidence  

CCcouple25m27f 36M/36F  
566 posts
10/12/2005 1:41 am

Last Read:
7/16/2006 9:08 pm

That Elusive Confidence

(alcohol will lead a person to doing things they dont normally do... like dance at a night club that doesnt involve stripping! Although that night, I did lose some clothing!)

My galpal summed it up for me the other day. All I lack is the confidence! (And a dose of hypnotherapy!)
When asked why I dont accept that I am pretty, I reply that I still see myself as the huge 300+ blob I was years ago. (Yes I mentally understand that I have lost a good portion of the weight, but something short circuits and I see an ugly blob when I look in the mirror!) Cowboy gets so frustrated with me, after all he keeps saying how beautiful I am to him, but I dont always believe him. The gentlemen who have given me compliments from this site tell me I am pretty, and I dont know how to handle the attention I guess.

In school, guys were mean. I was the "ton of fun" and Godzilla walking noises were made as I walked down the hallways. Looking back, it seems that had more of an effect on me than I thought. I was the good little girl, a virgin til 19 and then once I started, well I caught up fast!

Whats funny is my 10 year reunion is coming up, and they are combining classes to keep everyone current. That means the boys who tormented me, will be there at the reunion. (most likely) Part of me wants to walk in with the husband on one arm and a "girlfriend" on the other. Shock value, since after all I was such an innocent back then. (Sex ed was all clinical, so I had no clue until I was almost 19)

I told Cowboy tonight that I want to go to the beach and take some pictures around the bonfire. Using the truck as a backdrop and also using the waterline to do some pinup poses! I am looking for a decent adult webhost to do my website! At first I am gonna just do pictorals with a few video clips as funds become available. I might even act out a few short stories or something depending on what I can get done.

Did you all know that I wrote several erotic stories? They are listed under the Magazine section of this site. Just search for my user ID and you can read all my attempts at erotica thru written word.

If you do read them, please comment your opinion as I like to know what folks think!

Guess I will drop off for now!
Hugs and Gropes to all in Blogville

Jobe00 42M
211 posts
10/12/2005 4:20 am

My friend in Pittsburgh has the same issue about her looks. Apparently the guys in her area are complete fucking morons and don't think she looks down right hot.
I've told her time and again that she looks good, but she'll have none of it.

Good luck on your porn site.

wyvernrose 38F
3895 posts
10/12/2005 6:14 am

don't let em both you sweet heart I aint much smaller

know you are a beautiful woman it isn't the lack of curves which indicates beauty


rm_CCLordDamien 40M/38F
77 posts
10/12/2005 6:43 am

unfortunately, around highschool is when you form your final self image. that is, unless you work really hard at creating another. trust me, i don't see myself as slightly overweight and balding when i picture myself in my head.

on a related note, why is it easier for women to take and accept compliments from some people than others? even the most Introverted, self-confidenceless girl seems to accept that when i give a compliment, i mean it. I usually do, but......

Lord Damian

THX11381971 45M
8 posts
10/12/2005 9:04 pm

Hi Nina
Your galpal is rite you need to have more confidence is your self. You are very pretty and sexy and you should believe in what Justin tells you. You seem down alot about your looks and that needs to stop. Later Tyler

P.S. Tell Brandy I said hi.

bigman4finewoman 48M
25 posts
10/16/2005 6:57 pm

Worry not about what others think about you. I went through some rough times in hs too...but it's how YOU feel about yourself that matters most....women don't seem to take compliments well (I don't either, but I can't show off my body like you women can)

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