Red light, Green light....  

ByteChaser2 53M
2834 posts
11/3/2005 8:12 am

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

Red light, Green light....

He's baaaaaaack. And do I have stuff to talk about! You're not going to believe it either... or maybe you will. We'll see. So lets begin.

As your probably aware, I spent the last 10 days in Pearl and Waikiki on business. Now, this is unfamiliar ground (socially) for me so I figured I'd just rely on intuition and see what happened. I mean, there's people and places 0'plenty and more than enough to keep a guy occupied for a week and a half.

So, I arrived on a Saturday, decided to stay in and catch a good nights sleep before I went "on the prowl". Man needs his rest ya know. I just hung out in the room for a while, had a couple of drinks downstairs at one of the lounges, watched a movie on cable... chilled.

I've got friends (2 people who work for me) on the island. They both know my reputation - the strip club king and pursuer or young and attractive ladies - By Sunday evening, they were ready to get the boss out in his element and have some fun. So... Dinner and the Culture Club it was for the 3 of us.

One of these two is a newly unattached local girl, a real fireball young wahini with a passion for strip clubs to rival my own. I know, it surprised me a little too... but anyway...

We're out at one of the classier Waikiki clubs and having a great time. We've each got a dancer and we're all getting real comfy with em.

By the time the "ugly lights" came on at closing time, my two partners were nowhere to be found and I was left with this one young lady and her friend, chatting at the bar, finishing up our drinks and making ready to leave for the evening - Each for our own homes/rooms as it happened.

Now this young lady, I'll call her Milano as she was a sweet little Italian cookie (no pun intended), had expressed some interest - beyond sweating a customer for stripper drinks and tips - so I asked if she'd like to join my for a "normal" night out. She accepted and plans were made for dinner, drinks and dancing the next night.

So... I'm still very keenly aware of what I'd just gone through. The situation developing here was almost a mirror image of how it all started with "Her". But I'm AWARE and I'm making a truly Herculean effort to NOT go back there again. But companionship is companionship and I'm certainly not one to turn away from an opportunity to not be alone.

So... Dinner went great. Right up until desert. She'd got a call and rushed off to the rest room. When she returned a few minutes later, her whole mood flipped from happy, smiling, perky to gray/blue moody... Boyfriend maybe?

That was pretty much the end of the evening there. She took a taxi somewhere and I just went back to my hotel.

And the score is 1 and 1...

The next morning she'd sent me a text message apologizing for leaving so abruptly. No explanation... just an apology. She invited me out that night to try again and promised to keep her phone off the entire time. So... ok. I'll jump. I mean, it's that or start over from scratch right? Can you see where this is going yet?

So, second date. It's going great! She's engaging and a good conversationalist. She's asking very interesting questions of me and - I thought - answering mine with open honesty. As it turned out, the phone call the night before was her ex... and a "bad boy" if you catch my meaning...

Now, not to get off on a tangent but... Just what the fuck IS it with women and their infatuations with bad boys? Is it really sexy being treated like shit just because the guy is eye candy and has the tough guy persona? Have I been wasting my time on personality, charm and class? Has chivalry actually died while I wasn't looking? I mean... WHAT???

So anyway, it's starting to come into focus now. She's attached/after this guy. And that would explain why she's really not into PDA. No touching with her... period. Anyway, the evening progressed nicely and she accepted my invite to watch a movie at my room before we each went our separate ways for the evening. She wound up staying by the way... And no... There was no tickle pickle or ass grabbing going on.

I know what "no" means...

Date 3... We met at the club where she works, I stayed until closing, happy with her more or less constant company. We went kareoke-ing after closing and had loads of fun mangling song after song. She still wouldn't allow me to touch her for longer than a few seconds before she'd draw back and away. She didn't get moody or anything, just didn't want to be touched. Well... Ok. I can accept that and I'll just have to work around it right?

I'll shorten this up a bit and say that she stayed with me for the duration...

So long about Saturday, after we'd each decided to get tattoos - I'll up some shots to my albums so you can see mine - she started to get a bit more touchy and affectionate. She held my hand while the artist did his work and the conversation took a turn for the saucy. In fact, there was a comment made suggesting that I'd be generously "assailed" back at the room later that evening. Uh-huh... wait for it...

Back at the room, she'd gone back to the "no" routine. See the pattern emerging here? Still, I'm thinking she's taking this nice and slow, not just jumping into bed with what amounts to a complete stranger and all. I can certainly respect that so ok, I'm still playing along...

So, fast forward to last Monday night. It's my last day on the island so we decided to do something special. Dinner on the 36th floor of one of the hotels, an evening of live jazz, and sparkling conversation. It was going great! She sat close and allowed her hand to be held for brief moments. We danced and talked and here I thought that finally, she'd open up and give me some clue about her issues with affectionate touching...

We'd closed the restaurant that evening and decided to go back to my room for a movie and a bottle of wine. Now, keep in mind, I've been enduring her on again, off again moods for what... a week or so now. This evening was really the first that shed been almost spontaneous with the affection. I'm thinking I might actually get "lucky" now!

About half way to my hotel, she tells the driver to take her to her place. WTF!!! So now I'm just pissed and frustrated and confused. Fine. So I'm sulking on one side of the back seat, she's staring out the window on the other and I'm sure the driver thinks we're nuts...

On her way out of the taxi at her place, she says "sorry", gives me a peck on the cheek and she's gone.

I didn't sleep at all that night, still brooding about it on the plane ride home, and even this morning I'm so conflicted that I cant even drink my coffee without working up a good acid stomach. Part of me wants to just leave it go and chalk this all up to a lesson learned. Another wants to call her and demand some kind of explanation and still another clings to the thought that she really does have some form of interest but simply wants to go slow.

I suppose I should know better than to get involved with another stripper...

caressmewell 53F

11/3/2005 12:46 pm

Bummer. I think I would have given up on her after the second night. Sorry that it didn't work out for you.

ByteChaser2 53M

11/3/2005 1:44 pm

Hi caressme- I guess that was just me venting and all. but, you know... it's just that I'd put so much honest effort and care - and yeah... shallow Hal here - expense into just a friendly companionship and to have it snubbed like that...

Lesson learned... I'll know better next time around

helga_hansen 49F  
1987 posts
11/3/2005 2:50 pm

All this talk about lights made me wonder if you got the new plates for the Scarlet Harlot


Love, hugs and kisses from ♥♥HH♥♥

ByteChaser2 53M

11/3/2005 4:07 pm

They haven't arrived yet Helga. DMV can be positively motionless around here...

rm_sj365 55F
2414 posts
11/3/2005 5:47 pm

"Just what the fuck IS it with women and their infatuations with bad boys?"

ohhh, I dunno..its kinna like that infatuation men have with strippers

I'm soooooo glad you're back

rm_bella_ 47F
4030 posts
11/3/2005 10:53 pm

Not all women or strippers are like that. You just got a girl that said no. Her reasons you are not fully aware of either. 'Nuf said...

ByteChaser2 53M

11/4/2005 6:57 am

Sj, Bella - Ok, I deserved that I suppose. My appologies... I'm making an unfair categorization I know but I'd still like to know what the draw is.

I won't dwell on it though, I can see this touched a sensitive spot...

ByteChaser2 53M

11/4/2005 7:11 am

Ok, so I'm not done just yet lol

Bella, I know that all dancers and strippers and performers are not like this particular woman. In fact, I've found them to be an ecclectic grouping of personalities and for the most part manny have been my best and closest friends - and on a number of emotional and physical levels.

You can doubtless infer that I'm a communicator. I like to talk and analyze and understand. That this woman would flip from one signal to another and provide NO feedback... I mean what was she doing? Testing me? For 8 days? I didn't expect she'd just hop into bed with me on the first night (or any night for that matter) but I'd have expected that she'd have presented some clear indication so I'd know what was expected of me...

This has got to be one of the biggest pain points for guys - ok, likely everyone trying to develop a relationship, men and women alike I'm sure - All the "cloak and dagger", "hide and seek", maneuvering and posturing that goes on in relationships.

I just wish she'd say what she means and means what she says... ya know? I suppose that's why I'm here...

Oh, and I'm still working out the finer points on a response to your last posting. I think you'll like it. It'll be pretty long winded so I'll probably post it on mine and link to yours...

papyrina 51F
21133 posts
11/4/2005 1:30 pm

how the hell she could stay night after night and go to sleep baffles sure she wasn't a guy???

I'm a

i'm here to stay

ByteChaser2 53M

11/4/2005 3:51 pm

That's a good question papy... and a better one would be -

How the hell could I keep going back for more?

And no... I'm positive she had female equipment. I cant vouch for the chromosomes though, so for all I know she could have been a "convert"

Lapkin4u 42F

11/8/2005 10:49 am

I was catching up on reading my favorite posts today and I must say that I throughly enjoyed my reading experience here today!

ByteChaser2 53M

11/9/2005 1:09 am

Guess what lapkin, she text'd me this morning. she said, and I quote:

"sorry t**. I was fucked up. better luck next time."

I mean... WTF? Like this was a game or something. Help me out ladies... anyone that's had a conversation with me or read these blogs knows who I am, I'm an open book (Dr. Seuess perhaps?). I don't play games do I? Every waking moment is as real as the keyboard under your fingers!

One day... One day...

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