Another bout with depression...  

ByteChaser2 52M
2834 posts
5/31/2005 7:00 am

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

Another bout with depression...

Amazing. And here I thought I was over the worst of her. I'd actually started thinking of her in that special light reserved for those most special memories - and feeling pretty good, about her, me, and the reality that we'll never again be us.

Last night... I got one of her songs stuck in my head. Had - I shit you not - nightmares last night and who should make an appearance? Uh-huh... This morning, not even my journal is giving solice.

Could be a marked lack of coffee - been cutting way back the last few days. You think thats it? I'm in detox? Hmmmm. Could be I suppose. If I feel better after a cup, that may be it.

I need to find some mindless activity to keep me occupied. Something that takes oh, say a half dozen thought processes, something repetitive and numbing. I almost wish I had a big lawn. Nothing like mowing a couple acres of grass to really numb the senses...

Half a cup of coffee. Feeling a little better. There's a little light fog outside. A pack of coyote yelping up a storm in the field out back. Must have run down a rabbit (or neighborhood cat). The covey of quail is back too. Spied the cock strutting up the trail looking for his hens. They'll all be out calling by noon.

Better.... better.... It might actuallly turn out to be a good day after all. Oh look... I have lint between my toes.

ByteChaser2 52M

6/1/2005 9:42 pm

Pig? Tattler?? Huh?

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