Held  

ButteryDelight 58F
1961 posts
6/22/2006 10:26 am

Last Read:
7/4/2006 4:24 pm

Held


Why is life sometimes so unfair? And why do bad things happen to good people? I don’t know the answers to those questions. It seems to me that there is too much pain, too much sorrow, too much hatred, envy, greed, and strife in this world and not enough goodness, joy and happiness to counteract it. I am thinking about tilerbabe’s Brian, all those nasty comments on ohcurious and nightguys blogs, and now I hear from scotslass that skiddledee has stage B, inoperable lung cancer. I am extremely sad to learn about skiddledee. I have been crying off and on since I heard the news. My mother died from lung cancer a little more then a year ago. I miss her so much. I especially miss her when a major event is happening in my life and I have no mother to share it with. I feel lost with out my mother's love and on the day of Sarah’s wedding I will cry because my mother is not there to see her only grand daughter get married.

I am also thinking of another friend I have made here at AdultFriendFinder. She too has cancer but doesn't want many people to know. Neither she, nor skiddledee nor Brian did anything to deserve what they got, and that just irks me to no end. I want to scream and rant and rave, crying why, why, why??

What can I do about all of this, probably, not very much. I try to live my life in a way that is respectable to those around me and yet still state my needs. I try to follow the golden rule and do unto others the way I would have done to me. Unfortunately, not everyone else does the same. This I have learned to my sorrow. There are people who get their kicks, jollies, fun; what ever you want to call it, from being mean, spiteful, rude, and hateful towards others. There are people who murder, deal drugs, , steal and lie. I have noticed something. The people that do these things never seem to get what’s coming to them. The bad things like, loosing a job, getting cancer, the death of a loved one, a fire or other natural disasters; that never seem to happen to those kinds of people. That really yanks my chain and makes me want to chew and spit nails. That really is not fair. It also irritates me when the decent people get slammed with the bad stuff. It makes we wish I was God with a handy lightening bolt or two. I know some people I would really love to zap right about now. I know you are not supposed to have vengeful thoughts, that vengeance is mine saith the Lord and all that. But, there are times I’d just like to reach out with a lightening bolt and ZAP! There ya go, have some cancer; it’s what you get for your hatred. Or ZAP! There ya go, loose your job, your house, your car, and every thing else you hold dear in the world. It’s what you deserve for your envy and strife. And most of all a BIG ZAP! There ya go, have this, you earned it by being a child molester, murderer, drug dealer or .

Sighs. But, until such time as I receive my Godly Powers, I will continue to do what I can to be a decent, honorable person. I will offer comfort to those who are grieving, be kind to those with out jobs, or who are ill, and in general just survive this cold, cruel world day to day.

One of my favorite songs came on the radio while I was writing this post. I have included it below as I sure need to be held right now.

"Natalie Grant - Held"

Two months is too little
They let him go
They had no sudden healing
To think that providence would
Take a child from his mother while she prays
Is appalling

Who told us we’d be rescued?
And What has changed and why should we be saved from nightmares?
We’re asking why this happens
To us who have died to live?
It’s unfair

Chorus:
This is what it means to be held
How it feels when the sacred is torn from your life
And you survive
This is what it is to be loved
And to know that the promise was
When everything fell we’d be held

This hand is bitterness
We want to taste it, let the hatred NUMB our sorrow
The wise hands opens slowly to lilies of the valley and tomorrow

(Chorus) ...
This is what it means to be held
How it feels when the sacred is torn from your life
And you survive
This is what it is to be loved
And to know that the promise was
When everything fell we’d be held

Bridge:
If hope is born of suffering
If this is only the beginning
Can we not wait for one hour watching for our Savior?

(Chorus)
This is what it means to be held
How it feels when the sacred is torn from your life
And you survive
This is what it is to be loved
And to know that the promise was
When everything fell we’d be held

We’d be held


MamChelle 48F  
1443 posts
6/22/2006 1:11 pm

If i had the powers of the Goddess, BD...i just want to open hthose arms a little bit wider. You seem to always hitting home runs with your posts. i am so glad that you descided to open and write your blog. Our religeons may be different, i am just a Pagan heathen, but it feels sometimes as we are kindred.. *hugs and holding available upon request* c


ohcurious14 59M
1683 posts
6/22/2006 7:40 pm

It's called Compassion Buttery, something you have a whole hell of a lot of. Don't ever lose it either.

Ohcurious14---Aimlessly wandering & curious


ButteryDelight 58F

6/22/2006 11:34 pm

    Quoting MamChelle:
    If i had the powers of the Goddess, BD...i just want to open hthose arms a little bit wider. You seem to always hitting home runs with your posts. i am so glad that you descided to open and write your blog. Our religeons may be different, i am just a Pagan heathen, but it feels sometimes as we are kindred.. *hugs and holding available upon request* c
I'm not so sure about the "home runs" Sometimes I am tempted to run away and hide form all that stuff I mentioned in my post.

Thank you Chelle..* opening my arms for a hug..


ButteryDelight 58F

6/22/2006 11:40 pm

    Quoting __JVT__:
    BD...James Taylor's Fire and Rain comes to mind (I know...you are shocked) lol.

    At the time he wrote that song, he had just been in a mental institute and was undergoing shock therapy...that is what he is referring to as Fire and Rain. But, he also talks about seeing Sunny days that he thought would never end. We are going to see hard times, but hopefully, the good times have a greater impact on us.

    I know for me...that song has meant a lot to me over the years.

    I too wish there were something I could do to take away the pain and hurt that skiddle and pearl are going through right now. But, I will do what I can and right now, that is support them and keep them in my thoughts and prayers.

    Sorry...didn't mean to get so mushy...

    JVT
LOL..nope JVT..I ain't shocked. Since I've joined this site, nothing much shocks me any more. . I know the song and the lyrics well, JVT. I'm hoping for some sunny days of my own ahead.

Awww..join the crowd, JVT..a little mush is good for ya..

Buttery Delight


ButteryDelight 58F

6/22/2006 11:42 pm

    Quoting ohcurious14:
    It's called Compassion Buttery, something you have a whole hell of a lot of. Don't ever lose it either.

    Ohcurious14---Aimlessly wandering & curious
ok, ohcurious, sir.


ButteryDelight 58F

6/26/2006 7:23 am

    Quoting NaughtyBlonde78:
    Buttery...simply here to offer a hug...

    Today is your daughter's wedding day, right? I hope everything goes well, and I'm sure you'll have a great time!
Yes,naughtyblonde..the 24th was my daughter's wedding day. It was beautiful but sad too. I held it together though and only cried as I turned to watch her walk down the isle. Thanks for asking.


MamChelle 48F  
1443 posts
6/26/2006 1:21 pm

*hugging BD and laughing at how wonderful i felt reading JVTs mushness...* It is good to know that in my hardest of times i have been able to come here to this site and just be with some of the best people that i have ever had the priveldge of getting to know...BD you top that list in my heart. i look forward to a day when i can meet you and every one of those i consider F/friends here.
And pearl and skiddle and a few others are in my prayers and have candles lit on my alter for them...uplifting them sometimes is all one can do...but support here is abundant. *hugs* c


ButteryDelight 58F

6/27/2006 4:43 am

    Quoting MamChelle:
    *hugging BD and laughing at how wonderful i felt reading JVTs mushness...* It is good to know that in my hardest of times i have been able to come here to this site and just be with some of the best people that i have ever had the priveldge of getting to know...BD you top that list in my heart. i look forward to a day when i can meet you and every one of those i consider F/friends here.
    And pearl and skiddle and a few others are in my prayers and have candles lit on my alter for them...uplifting them sometimes is all one can do...but support here is abundant. *hugs* c
*hugging you right back Chelle. There are several on this site I would like to meet one day. YOU are one of those.

I am not Catholic or pagen, but I too have lit candles. *shrugs..Every little bit helps us to remember those who are suffering.


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