Addendum  

Bubbalicious85 31F
10 posts
5/2/2005 10:46 pm

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

Addendum


Grrr... I don't care if you're a sex therapist, or a professor of human sexuality or whatever. Please do not downplay my sexual experiences, about which you know nothing. I had a 4 year long relationship before I met my current boyfriend, and not in some innane junior high school kind of way. We slept with each other for 3 years in total, and now I am with my current boyfriend. I love him very much and the sex we have is out of this world because of that. And I'm also not rationalizing that in any way. The sex would asbolutely stand on its own as very superficially satisfying, but because of the love we share, it is so much deeper. Just because I'm young doesn't mean I don't know the difference between like and love and good sex and convincing yourself you're having good sex. Yeah, I'm only 19, but I DO have a basis of comparison, you ignorant bastard. I'm glad you have a PhD. I have a soul that, deep inside, still believes that lovemaking is far better when there's actually LOVE there. I'm not some fucking child who's never had sex with someone who knew what he was doing.

I have issues with my sexuality in the first place. I know this to be true. I really think I may be addicted to sex, in the sense that I have come to rely upon the chemical responses it produces. I am trying very hard to deal with this part of my brain. I mean, it IS getting in the way of me living the rest of my life. I was willing to give up the one man I have ever truly loved for sheap thrills, and it's got me thinking about what part of me makes decisions like that, and why I am so easily able to just shut off that switch inside.

And through it all, he has loved me. He has been furious, and despairing, and sick to his stomach at the mere thought of me, but he NEVER stopped loving me. Even when it was easier to do so. I love you, my darling, and I know that one day we will be fully reconciled again.

rm_martydm 51M

5/4/2005 10:18 am

Is sex bad? No. Are you doing anything against the law? No. Other than your boyfriend, are you causing physical/emotional pain to anyone? No. Is what has happened and you engaging in sex had any negative effects on your environment? No. Are you a person who has good grasp of who she is and think thoroughly about her actions? Yes. Are you experiencing life as anyone else would and handling its adversities? Yes. Do you two love each other and doing your best to get past this hurdle? Yes!! If someone was a therapist or knowledgable in the area human sexuality, they wouldn't be drawing conclusions based on simply what has been written in your blogs. There are certainly too many factors and much that is unknown to this "therapist" or "professor" to make any kind of accurate or even close to accurate diagnosis. Bubbalicious, you two just keep doing your best to mend and heal. Communicate w/ each other do what you need to do to make it work. I believe...
-Michael


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