Longings for former loves...  

Bobbingjoy 59F
213 posts
7/9/2006 11:08 pm

Last Read:
7/19/2006 7:52 am

Longings for former loves...

One a.m., home alone, wondering what ever happened to some old friends and former loves now far apart, far apart in body and probably in soul. I know I loved several deeply, some passionately, a number fleetingly, and a few rather poorly (mea culpa).

There was this red-headed boy whom I adored, who seemed to adore me too... a way back in grade one. He walked me home from school, through the Vancouver drizzle, holding my books and my hand, never saying much, just smiling at each other seemed totally enough. Then, one day, when summer came, he walked out of my young life forever... [Aah, Charlie Brown - I too had a little red-headed love.]

And David, the tall, dark and handsome one. We spent only a few weeks together over several years, wrote long letters to each other across this planet Earth, filled with delight and adventure as we meandered our separate ways pursuing our very separate studies. We promised to meet each other under Le Tour Eiffel on Bastille Day one year. We never did... and I've avoided Le Tour every time I've been in Paris since.

Then not long ago, a long distance relationship, fully charged with much passionate romance and sensuality over many months, came to fruition. He sailed into my life, charmed me with his easy delight in my son, told me of his intrigue in me, wrapped me with his passion, ... and sailed away with vague promises of equally vague futures together...

Even as I long for these former loves, the magical moments shared, the passionate cravings assuaged... I wonder at my feeling bereft.

So next.... a toast to new loves?

AcctsPeonyPelts 62M
7 posts
7/14/2006 12:14 pm

That's a great one. We all have those feelings really. Each of our special relationships in our lives brings out a certain part of us which is unique. Being human beings we don't through out the bad and keep the good. Well, at least some of us . I have always said that each relationship is like a signature. It's unique in its own way. I'm sure neither you or I have had the same experience with a different person. Now, I'm wondering what to say about what to do about it. Yes, I suppose we can long for them. I think its more longing for the experience than the person though. I know I'm still looking for it.

Bobbingjoy replies on 7/19/2006 8:02 am:
Hey, Westboro,
It's all too true, "we don't throw out the bad and keep the good." Would that I truly, fully, could throw out the bad. But then, I've learned from those "bad", even as I've delighted in the "good".

You're wise, methinks, when you say "it's more longing for the experience".

Sheesh... back to the drawing board.

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