Labels, Labels.. Are you a SWINGER???  

BenefitsFriend69 57M/60F
1008 posts
12/11/2005 11:15 pm

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

Labels, Labels.. Are you a SWINGER???

Labels, labels.… Man I get tired of 'em. You’re a this, I’m a that. Ism ism ism ism.. Sigh..

Now, we all have our roles we must play. If we didn’t have roles, we wouldn’t be human. I play the role of engineer, father, lover, friend, bike rider, skier, runner, eater, drinker, walker, talker, la de da.. But when I’m sitting around in the hot tub, I’m not performing any of those roles am I? They’re going on in the background I suppose. If I’m just sitting around in the hot tub, am I a hot tub sitter?

I think a role is different than a label. A role is something you’re doing that has a name. A label is something someone projects on to you, and has some kind of interpretation in their mind. For example:

SWINGER. I recently told an old friend about this site. I tried to give him a sense of the dimensions, kinds of people on here, etc.

Him: “Oh, so you’re a swinger now?”
Me: “Well, what’s a swinger to you?”
Him: “Someone who has sex with more than one person at a time, or with people other than their significant others.”
Me: “Ah, I see.. Well I don’t have a significant other right now.”
Him: “Yeah I know, you lucky bastard. So have you been doing it???”
Me: “I’ve dabbled in it yeah, but to tell ya the truth, it doesn’t really trip my trigger.”
Him: “Oh, so you’re not a swinger then?”

According to Webster, a swinger is:
a. A lively, up-to-date person who indulges in what is considered fashionable;
b. b. one who engages freely in sex

Heh heh heh.. As opposed to cheaply?

See how people wanna put us in boxes? In my latest contract job gig, everybody is talking about Christmas and things. One of the guys I met at this recent job was asking me what I do for Christmas. He’s married, a few years younger than me, with a little kid.

Him: “So do you put up a Christmas tree?”
Me: “Na, I don’t bother with it. My kids are older and I never really got into it much as an adult.”
Him: “Oh! I see you wear wrist beads and talk a lot about Zen stuff, so since you’re a Buddhist, you don’t celebrate Christmas?”
Me: “Well I never said I was a Buddhist. But those teachings make a lot of sense to me.”
Him: “So you’re a Christian?”
Me: “No, I wouldn’t consider myself a Christian. But I love what Christ taught about kindness and love.”
Him: “Oh, so you’re an atheist or an agnostic?”
Me: “No, I don’t see myself in either of those categories?”
Him: “Well what ARE you then?”
Me: “What am I to you?”
Him: “What?”

That got me the blank stare I was hoping for to leave him befuddled.

Anyway, I gotta go figure out what I am. And what I’m gonna get everyone for Christmas. See ya’ll later.


rm_FreeLove999 46F
16127 posts
12/12/2005 12:18 am

yeah, i don't get these things either. other people have called me a swinger, but since at the moment i am only having sex with one person (ok, he is not my significant other) i dunno ... these names etc are just silly -- and much more for the person who wants to label you than for anything to do with yourself...



[blog freelove999]


Anthonyblue 63M

12/12/2005 12:56 am

I think you are a very wise man, who also has a lot of common sense.

Nice post.

Anthonyblue, Straight-talker.


frangipanigal 44F
10406 posts
12/12/2005 4:20 am

Would you mind working out my Christmas present list, shopping for it and then home delivering it PLEASE!!!

I'll wrap your presents in return.

Frangi x


digdug41 49M

12/12/2005 5:08 am

hey bf69 I've never quite thought about it, I know for a while I was a slut when I was out there because I nailed anything moving but now I dont get down like that, so I guess those who know me would call me a funky monk. good post

roaming the cyber streets of blogland


LongHairBrunette 53F
1 post
12/13/2005 5:25 pm

Hey BF69,

Let's define role......

Role = 1. A part played by an actor or actress in a dramatic performance. 2. The characteristic and expected social behavior of an individual. 3. A position or function.

I'll take #3 <grin>

Love your writing and you do want to express yourself, don't you? <wink> Keep up the blogs - they are awesome!

Lovely Woman


BenefitsFriend69 57M/60F

12/13/2005 9:16 pm

freelove - exactly. it's a total projection. just because someone puts it out doesn't mean we have to wear the label. Their stuff.

Anthony - greetings, hey thanks for stopping by to read my stuff. Is that a blue knob end and dark shaft I see there? Have read your stuff too, nice to have a new set of good stuff to read. It's all about having a laugh I think.

frangi x - no worries mate, can I deliver "down under"

digdug - funky monk, groovy baby! I think that's you.

sil: good idea.


BenefitsFriend69 57M/60F

12/13/2005 9:23 pm

LovelyWoman: Yes I want to express myself and I don't need 37 pieces of flair to do it! LOL! <--- If you don't recognize it, that's an Office Space movie reference. If you've seen it, then you're probably an Office Space junkie like me and Lovely Woman and loads of others on here. Your kids love it and you watch it like the Rocky Horror Picture Show. And if you're really lucky, a lovely woman has given you a red stapler and Initech coffee mugs. If you haven't seen it, check it out, you'll laugh.

BTW LHB, I had no idea you were into "roll definition" darling.. Can you say Superman and Lois Lane?? Woo hoo!!!!


barbiebunny 36F
5597 posts
12/14/2005 3:51 am

LOL u michevious thing u xoxo

Its good to be...ME


BenefitsFriend69 57M/60F

12/14/2005 5:13 pm

hee hee bunz, takes one to know one!


rm_goddess1946 106F
13518 posts
12/19/2005 10:31 am

I believe that labels can serve when one needs to write identity information on a package that has been wrapped up to put into the freezer...for one reason or another... sigh.

everything serves....
the question simply is how?

Just a little food for thought.............
If you really want to be happy, nobody can stop you...
{=}


BenefitsFriend69 57M/60F

12/26/2005 10:12 am

Hi goddess, yeah, I guess if I didn't label what I put in the freezer I'd end up eating a chicken pot pie instead of the beef. I realize our minds think in terms of words and things, so it can be convenient to label. And for scientific facts and freezer bags it's fine. But when I label you as anything but beautiful, do I negate you, as some wise philosopher said?

Hugs,
BF


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