If I Become Famous, Will I Get A Boob Job?  

AtomicArtist0 45M
5236 posts
12/9/2005 9:16 pm

Last Read:
3/5/2007 10:18 pm

If I Become Famous, Will I Get A Boob Job?

Well, it seems that the wit, the charm, the humor, the AtomicArtist is becoming quite popular. between my crass horoscopes and all the other weird crap I write down, I've skyrocketed to 6th place in my area in a very short time. 6th...I know...the 5th loser and thats probably no extraordinary feat for most of you, but considering I only have three pages of blog material, and only 25 posts, thats not so bad. A slow reader can read my entire blog in much less than an hour if you so wanted to. I know...I've done it.

I'll explain why I have recently read my own blog in about three or four blog entries form now, but for now, if I keep this up and if I work hard and continue to find new ways to intrigue new readers and keep all my recurring friends, I could become one of the most watched Big Dogs...one of the Popular kids at school...one of the Jet Setters...one of the Beautiful People.

So I post these questions to you...the Big Dogs,the Popular Kids at School, the Jet Setters, The Beautiful People. you on everybodies watched lists. You, who are top in your area, or in the world. You who have tasted fame and all of Blogland knows your name...you who are pictured in the upper right corner, there. You know who you are...we all do.

If I became famous,would it make my apartment seem larger? Would it make me taller? Would it make my car nicer, my couch more luxurious than it has ever been, and my cock taste sweeter? Would it shine my shoes? Would it make my jokes funnier? Would it make my serious posts more insightful and more soulful?

Will I end up forgeting the little people...the very same little people who would have made me famous in the first place? Will I be too famous to comment back or visit anyone else's blog? Will people only be able to contact me through my agent?

Will I demand body guards...midget body guards? Will I dye my hair, get my nails done, push people around, or yell at everyone while I get a facial, or botox injections or my anus whitened? Will I get a boob job? Will I get big, succulent, beautiful breasts that stay firm even as I'm jumping up and down on a trampoline?

Will I demand only Evian and peeled grapes? Will I have a personal trainer, a personal shopper, a fashion consultant, or a hair stylist? Will I belittle wait staff and dump food on the floor if it doesn't please my pampered pallate? Will I strut around naked all the time, but sue everyone who looks at me?

Will I get a book deal, a movie deal or a Nike commercial? Will people sell my autograph on ebay? Will I get invited to all the best parties? Will I know where to score only the sweetest Columbian blow? Will Nicole, Paris, and Tara finally return my calls? will the only way the little people can know what I'm doing is through the lurid pages of tabliods? Will they make a VH1 behind the blog special of me after I check into rehab and become a has-been?

So tell me, you Big Dogs, you Popular Kids at School, you Jet Setters, You Beautiful People...will this all happen? What advice do you have for this shooting star, for this little dog in training? This blog entry is for you and the comments are yours.

Maybe for humor sake, I can take a couple of comments from the little people, but don't think I'm here to listen to the likes of you. Be warned, that my assistant and I are only here to laugh at your misfortune. I totally turned into a primadonna when I was employee of the month at this pizza place I worked at when I was a kid, so I can anticipate the same when I become a Big Dog.

To show that this is all in good humor, my very next post will be called...VH1 Behind The Blog Interview With AtomicArtist.

But enough about me and my blog, my fame, my boobjob, my luxurious couch, my sweet cock, my Evian, and my anus whitening...how are you all doing?


PrincessKarma 43F
6188 posts
12/10/2005 7:23 am

Gee, I dunno... I'm just a mid-level blogger...

The Big Bang was the mother of all orgasms.PrincessKarma


HORNYVIKING722 44M
1023 posts
12/10/2005 10:12 am

LMAO! I'm just one of the little people likely to get crushed if that chip on some big dog's shoulder slips off. Funny thing is that the sh** you wrote there is so true. I get the feeling that from not kneeling and kissing the a** of one the big heads here, that those that are faithfully in that cilque haven't even replied to my comments. In know the fearless leader hasn't given me more than 10 comments in my domain since I've started though they were instrumental in my starting a blog. Well, I would cry about it, but I've got a date and must be off. Great post and no matter which big dogs don't visit and tell you the truths, you'll always be a big dog to me. Even in your gimp suit!


craptoast 39M

12/10/2005 11:43 am

we should start a club for us new up and comers. the new crass pack. the small group of wise ass monkeys who dominated the field in mere months and all roughly at the same time. and then we should eat nachos. by the truckload. mmm. nachos.


AtomicArtist0 45M
6015 posts
12/10/2005 1:59 pm

Tipadee...wow! This has got to be the longest and funniest comment for me ever...which is why I'll dismiss the fact that you're just a little dog. I guess I can associate with the likes of you for a little while, but as soon as Paris, Nicole, and Tara return my calls you're screwed. Even though I'm only a mid-level blogger, I'll have you know that I'm already a beer snob and that watered down bud light has never touched these pampered lips. Its Shlitz or nothing! Evacuating all the poor souls at the flophouse and turning it into an exclusive night club for me, Johnny Depp and all the other A-listers would be fun. Good idea, in fact! I'll get that ball rolling now and spray them all with a firehose. I like the crime blotter idea!

PrincessKarma...surely you give yourself more credit than that. You're the top in your area, you've got a great blog and you're single-handedly the knuckledragger queen (whether you like it or not).You put the fear of God into us guys and you make me think twice before I burp, scratch my ass, and make my date pay for the meal, for fear I end up on your list. If only I were in Panama, and with an IQ as staggeringly high as yours,I'd be honored to take you out sometime.

HornyViking...my humblest thanks for the compliments. In the whole scheme of the world, you're up ahead of me, so you're not such a little dog yerself, but thank you for the insight. You speak many, many truths. Good luck on yer date and remember not to burp, scratch yer ass, or make your date pay for the meal lest you end up on Karma's knuckledragger list.

Craptoast...we're on the same wavelength, my friend. I've thought of that idea of a club of mid-level up and comers who fit your mentioned criteria, but you've just thought of the perfect name. The Crass Pack...I like it! In my mind you've always been in the club as well as Viking. Lets make it a reality. You order the truckload of nachos and I'll hire the midget strippers.


caressmewell 53F

12/10/2005 11:40 pm

LMAO, that's funny. I hope not, I don't want your attitude to change, I like it just the way it is.

HV, I hope you don't feel the same for me as you do the "top dog".


AtomicArtist0 45M
6015 posts
12/11/2005 12:45 am

1BBL...glad you're enjoying your fame and all that comes with it. I can't wait for my boob job and my anus whitening. I get my anus whitened now, but its a little freakish looking as all I can afford right now is white-out.

Caress...aw, what a sweet compliment. thank you. and I'll be chock full of that same attitude on my next post about the VH1 interview. Yup. and about viking, there isn't enough bell towers in the world to squelch all his rage.


jakblack36 48M

12/11/2005 9:50 am

Here's what I would do. You mentioned in one of hornyviking722 blog on his pryor post about missing Indian Larry. Get the fuckin boob job and forget about the anal whitening. Let your big precious new titties fly freely in the wind with your currently stained anus on the seat of one of Larrys fine jeweled creations.


HORNYVIKING722 44M
1023 posts
12/11/2005 12:15 pm

No matter what...


HORNYVIKING722 44M
1023 posts
12/11/2005 12:15 pm

Viva


HORNYVIKING722 44M
1023 posts
12/11/2005 12:15 pm

la


HORNYVIKING722 44M
1023 posts
12/11/2005 12:16 pm

CrassPack!!!


HORNYVIKING722 44M
1023 posts
12/11/2005 12:17 pm

oh,


HORNYVIKING722 44M
1023 posts
12/11/2005 12:17 pm

and


HORNYVIKING722 44M
1023 posts
12/11/2005 12:18 pm

POSITIVE


HORNYVIKING722 44M
1023 posts
12/11/2005 12:19 pm

VIBES


HORNYVIKING722 44M
1023 posts
12/11/2005 12:20 pm

Bitch!!!


AtomicArtist0 45M
6015 posts
12/11/2005 1:48 pm

jak...welcome to my blog, man. I've heard good things about you and I can't wait to see you in that King Kong movie. You're absolutely right, when I become famous, I should blow my entire fortune on original Indian Larry's signature oldskool choppers...and maybe still get the boob job. Then I'd really be the king of cool. who's der daddy now, bitches!


AtomicArtist0 45M
6015 posts
12/11/2005 1:53 pm

wow Viking! you're single-handedly going to get me on the road to that boob job and anus whitening if you keep commenting like that...which would be great as all I can afford now is socks down my shirt and white-out.


PrincessKarma 43F
6188 posts
12/12/2005 5:19 am

Atom, sweetie, I'm only the top blogger in Central America bcause I a) post consistently, and b) post in English. I'm nowhere near the likes of, say, caressmewell or AlbertPrince, much less travelingintexas...

As for burping and scratching your butt, it's ok with me as long as you don't do it in public; I have a father, brothers, stepfather, stepbrother and ex-BFs... Plus, I've been known to pay for more than one meal, I believe in equality. Hell, I've even been the one to ask a guy out on a date!

Yu'll beo fine, just keep your new nose clean and stay away from Britney Spears!

The Big Bang was the mother of all orgasms.PrincessKarma


AtomicArtist0 45M
6015 posts
12/12/2005 6:41 pm

BigGirlz....whoa! yer calling me a big dog AND the funniest guy on this sight bar none!! what an honor. thank you so very much. I will take that with me always. Even if you weren't trying to get in my pants, that is still totally hot! awww snap!! whos yer daddy?!

Pants? what pants?


AtomicArtist0 45M
6015 posts
12/12/2005 11:01 pm

sil...yes, top 50 and in a cult...then you are a big dog. As I've been a cult leader before I'm not looking to join yours but rather start my own...and this time there will be a lot more kool-aid.

but as one of the only big dogs to make it out onto my blog (cough couch) you've answered all my questions. If I can't belittle wait staff and sue everyone who sees my sweet naked bod, then nothing is worth doing. Thanks for bumming me out.


AtomicArtist0 45M
6015 posts
12/13/2005 9:04 pm

Princess...too late. I was already married to Britney Spears, but it lasted only 49 minutes. If I hadn't scratched my ass and burped in public, I'm pretty sure I could have made that marriage last a day or even a day and a half...long enough for her to be my meal ticket...at least for like a week or so.


ArgosPlumyKooky 45F
3902 posts
12/17/2005 5:38 am

atomic- don't know about everything else, but it will definitely make your cock taste sweeter, no doubt about that!


AtomicArtist0 45M
6015 posts
12/17/2005 11:25 am

hi...um...snatch. You're right, fame will do that to someone...make their tender vittles taste so much sweeter. Now, if only I could lose a couple of ribs I can experience the sweetness for myself.


Become a member to create a blog