Because I Won...So Do You...(I Guess?)  

AtomicArtist0 45M
5236 posts
4/12/2006 8:01 pm

Last Read:
10/21/2007 11:29 am

Because I Won...So Do You...(I Guess?)

In keeping in tradition with posting every two or three days, my thank you acceptance speech for winning best non-fiction story is about three days late. It doesn’t mean I don’t appreciate you all any less. I was just so overwhelmed and frazzled when I won, that I couldn’t think up anything brilliant to write immediately, so I let the disgruntled Mr. Kimball take all my congratulatory comments for me and kicked back for the past few days.

So, I’m here now to thank you all who had voted for me, all those who had maybe thought of voting for me, and all those who provided your support in any way. I want to thank caressmewell for running the writing competition for us as I’m certain that was a difficult task.

So, as I won the competition for best non-fiction, I want to offer you the gift of…um…non-fiction. As my blog is a carefully timed engine of exaggeration and humorous tales, it is designed to keep me and the inner workings of my life shrouded in mystery. So, here I offer you the opportunity to ask me anything you’d like about me. I will answer in return with absolute truths. (within reason) This time, I’ll promise to answer anything you like without hiding behind humor and deranged characters. I even chose to show a photo that I think to be unflattering to let you know that I am being sincere. So, is there anything you’re just dying to know? Ask away.

And rest assured, that in the very next post (maybe even tonight) I will go back to hiding behind humor and deranged characters. Oh, boy, you better believe it! Oh yeah!

Thank you all for everything you had done for me. I truly appreciate you.

caressmewell 53F

4/12/2006 8:39 pm

Your welcome..I enjoy hosting the writers challenge on my blog.

I like your handsome man you, why do you not like this picture?

AtomicArtist0 replies on 4/13/2006 12:15 am:
I don't like the picture because it makes my whole face look crooked. if you trace a line down my forehead to my chin, it all looks crooked. maybe my face really is. Plus the pose is more confrontational than the usual one of me looking down my nose at everyone. Any chance of a more confrontational pic from you?

angelofmercy5 58F
17881 posts
4/12/2006 8:39 pm

Congratulations! I can't think of anything to ask I will just come back and read everyone elses questions and your answers.

AtomicArtist0 replies on 4/13/2006 12:16 am:
aw darn...but ok, if you think of some, then ask here. I'll answer. I promise.

happyladychat 47F
3740 posts
4/12/2006 8:47 pm

Congratulations! Now.... let me go look up your winning piece.

Make it your challenge.... turn me ON!!

AtomicArtist0 replies on 4/13/2006 12:17 am: back with a question for me.

mm0206 68F
7767 posts
4/12/2006 10:51 pm

Congratulations Atomic!!


AtomicArtist0 replies on 4/13/2006 9:16 pm:
thank you for everything. thank you so much

ediesedgewick 57F

4/13/2006 3:49 am

Nice pic--you look cute. Do you know most faces are asymetrical?

Well, I always do as I am told...
Have you ever taken a hammer to your penis...or known anyone who has...or known anyone who thought you did? Yeah. Weird question--had a weird dream last night...again.

Here's my normal interview question:
AtomicArtist--man of "mystery"--your thousands of fans are dying to know--what started you down the golden path of this writing career?

AtomicArtist0 replies on 4/13/2006 9:58 pm:
thank you for the compliment. yes, i knew most faces are asymetrical, but that pic really exaggerates it. Did you know Danzel Washington supposedly has the most symetrical face of all the celebs therefore making his face the most aestheticly perfect. Thats what i heard.

I've never taken a hammer to my penis, and I don't know anyone personally who has. You thought I did...when I told you I may have used my hardened penis as a hammer against a table or a willing participant's thigh or ass. but I never took a hammer to it. however, i subscribe to Bizarre magazine. Its a mag from England that has all kinds of weird shit from all over the world. Occasionally, they may have an article on guys who hammer nails through their penis or balls. its a good read.

As for your other question, the first memory i had of writing anything had to do with me being very disruptive in second grade. I don't remember what I did, but I had to have my desk out in the hall out of the classroom for about a week. It really made me miserable. One of my assignments while i was out there was to use my energy toward something constructive. I was supposed to write a story. I did, and apparently it turned out great...years ahead of my grade level. I wrote a lot of stories growing up and had some creative writing classes in high school. In college, i was in a poetry class where we got to read our stuff aloud. everybody couldn't wait for me to read and when I did, everybody perked up, because they knew it would be demented with lots of crazy voices and off-the-wall ideas. I just always had a knack for it. i was quite the performer. great question. Thanks.

saddletrampsk 54F

4/13/2006 9:34 am

Congrats on your win question to you is:

what's you r favorite sexual fantasy and why?

AtomicArtist0 replies on 4/13/2006 10:23 pm:
thank you dear.

my fave sexual fantasy...this is terrible, actually. While being on AdultFriendFinder, I am supplied with all kinds of fantasy material to think of. But the person I fantasize about the most is my ex-girlfriend's mom. the one from the story. the problem is...I don't even like her. She wasn't too bright, she interrupted me every time i talked, she was self-centered, condiscending, a rich socialite, and we just clashed on so many levels. still, she appears in a lot of my fantasies in so many different scenarios. Hot tubs, skinny dipping in the lake, walking in on me fucking her daughter, then wanting me to jion in, me spraying her with a garden hose outside and wetting her tee-shirt. i don't know what it all means. I don't even like her and shes the one I fantasize about the most. I wish I can have normal fantasies.


4/13/2006 9:41 pm

ok here is your question...
What flavor would you think would taste best being licked off of my ass?
Your the best! Congrats!

AtomicArtist0 replies on 4/14/2006 6:45 pm:
off your ass? I'm a big fan of anything chocolate. chocolate sauce. chocolate ice cream. whipped cream and cherries are nice also. but if I am going to eat anything off your ass, I'd help you out with a baby wipe first...that way, we get only the good chocolate and not the bad chocolate. I'd do the same for you if you were eating anything off my ass.

rm_AnOddGirl 57F
3469 posts
4/13/2006 10:40 pm


Now the question: What does your car say about you?


AtomicArtist0 replies on 4/14/2006 8:14 pm:
A car says a lot about who you are. Nothing says "I'm important" like a guy in a Prowler telling somebody on his cell phone that he's important. A mini van says you have a lot of kids, a trans-am tells the world you have a mullet, a prius says "I'm ecco-friendly" and a wv bus tells everyone that you are a free spirit. An IROC stands for "Italian Retard Out Cruising"...still, all of these cars are better than what I have, which nothing. it tells the world that i don't get out of the house much and I live very close to work.

rm_art_persists 51M
1789 posts
4/13/2006 11:38 pm


AtomicArtist0 replies on 4/14/2006 8:14 pm:
thank you

spinmedown 49M
3626 posts
4/14/2006 4:06 pm

Congratulations, Bud!

What's the first thing that comes to your mind after reading this:

"Fear and loathing in _________ ."

Most people are other people... FUCKING CHARACTER LIMIT!!! ~Oscar Wilde

AtomicArtist0 replies on 4/14/2006 8:16 pm:
its definately Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas followed a close second by Fear and Loathing in My Boxer Shorts.

Vick_Demise 44M
2431 posts
4/14/2006 4:51 pm

congrats man for real! but what I what I'm wondering is do you have a stepping stool for top shelf items in the upper cabnets, or are they just empty?

No seriously, what's you favorite kind of Girl Scout cookie, I've got a whole bunker full of them I'll send you a box as congratulations, for I've gotta save the cigars for when the commies invade and I've got to barter for safe passage.

You can shine your shoes and wear a suit
You can comb your hair and look quite cute
You can hide your face behind a smile
One thing you can't hide
Is when you're crippled inside

AtomicArtist0 replies on 4/14/2006 8:20 pm:
oh a short joke, huh? you bitch! I can reach everything on the top shelf of my cupboards without a problem. For anything on top of my cupboards, I have to practice my jump shot, which usually ends up with my wok or my cutting board landing on my face.

I like the chocolate cookies with more chocolate poured over the top. mmmmmmm...chocolate.

Vick_Demise 44M
2431 posts
4/14/2006 4:55 pm

do you know you look a little like harvey keitel in that pic?

what I only get one question?!?!?

You can shine your shoes and wear a suit
You can comb your hair and look quite cute
You can hide your face behind a smile
One thing you can't hide
Is when you're crippled inside

AtomicArtist0 replies on 4/14/2006 8:24 pm:
Harvey Keitel? really? Then I will take that as a compliment! I loved him as Mr. Wolf in Pulp Fiction. he's so cool and curt. Everything I strive to be.

Now...I'm only going to say this once...get out there and clean the fucking car.

How was that?

Vick_Demise 44M
2431 posts
4/14/2006 6:15 pm

Will you make me a full sized copy of the modern art "Britney Spears giving birth on a bear skin rug out of lego?

You can shine your shoes and wear a suit
You can comb your hair and look quite cute
You can hide your face behind a smile
One thing you can't hide
Is when you're crippled inside

AtomicArtist0 replies on 4/14/2006 8:26 pm:
a lifesized rendition of britney Spears giving birth on a bear skin rug? soulds like a great challenge. and judging by the pieces I have, sadly I can't. sorry.

rm_AnOddGirl 57F
3469 posts
4/15/2006 7:41 am

    Quoting Vick_Demise:
    do you know you look a little like harvey keitel in that pic?

    what I only get one question?!?!?
Thanks Vick! I was trying to decide who Atomic looked like in his pic, it was between Harvey and Rip Torn!


AtomicArtist0 replies on 4/15/2006 10:09 pm:
Rip Torn?! gasp!

rm_AnOddGirl 57F
3469 posts
4/16/2006 2:03 pm

Gasp? Good or bad? I Like Rip Torn!

skyking412004 53M
5363 posts
5/1/2006 9:54 pm

_____Congratulations. Is it true that you have a twelve inch weenie and the stamina of ten men to go with it? Has anyone ever said that you look like Ernie Anderson. ernie anderson was one of the original black and white T.V. greats. He used to play a character on W.J.W. in Cleveland on late night T.V. called Goulardy. I like the pic. it makes you look devilish. I can almost see your horns.

AtomicArtist0 45M
6015 posts
5/1/2006 10:10 pm

damn! ain't it just like you to be two weeks late for something! But since this is the "truth be told" post and you asked some legit questions, I'll answer them. No, I don't have a twelve inch weenie. Any girl wanting a twelve inch weenie, I just fuck them twice to make up for it. Also, I don't have the stanima of 10 men. But I am considered above average in that regard...or so I heard. that I think about it mathematicly...if the average sexual encounter is 7 mins, 7 x10 is 70mins, then yes, I can sometimes have the stanima of 10 men. Not straight up thrusting, but doing all kinds of other play thrown in for good measure.

I've been told I look like Harvey Keitel and even Joe Peschi (embarrased) but never Ernie Anderson. I don't know who he is, but if hes an old black and white great, i trust he's someone I could enjoy being akin to looking like.

I have a pait of devil horns that looks just perfect on me. many halloweens i end up being the devil...only because i pull it off so well.

memeanne74 42F
5991 posts
10/20/2007 9:48 pm

Ok...I am about a year and 5 mos late ..

But Hey fuck it I'll ask several.

So what is you favorite part of a chubby chick ..(yes I am chubby and like my cute roundness .)

Favorite Song & by Whom ?

Favorite Piece D'Art ?

Favorite food ? ( Not Pussy !)

Did you ever join the black Panthers never said ...Down with the man !

If you had a whole day with me what would you do and why ?

LMAO..and you know I am actually laughing right ?

HA !


" I think the quality of sexiness comes from within. It is something that is in you or it isn't and it really doesn't have much to do with breasts or thighs or the pout of your lips."

AtomicArtist0 replies on 10/21/2007 12:00 pm:
ok to answer all your questions a year and 5 months too late...

I like a nice, round, micely shaped ass. I'm picky, even amongst chubby chicks. Sometimes an ass is too flat or narrow. I like hips and a very womanly shape.

Tom Waits is my absolute all time favorite and I can't pick one song...but I can say the whole CD called "Alice" is my favorite. its a whole concept CD about Alice in Wonderland and also lewis Carrol's affinity for young girls. Waits handles such a sensitive subject beautifully and tenderly. The entire CD is heartfelt, dark, masterful and lovely. It takes me to another world when I listen to it. His CDs "Real Gone" "Blood Money" or "Bone Machine" comes in a close second.

Art..."Snow White" by Mark Ryden or "Mombassa's Body Guard" or "The Wages of Sin" by Shag

Fave food...besides Indian food

Nah...never joined Black Panthers...with my blog, its hard to glean truth from lies

A whole day with you...providing we ever get out of bed...I would take you to the Seattle Public Library...which is an architectual marvel. There's a whole floor that's cavernous, all red with curving walls and is hotter than the other feel like you're inside a womb. Then maybe off to a sexy club I like to go to for some naughty fun. Guests have to be within sight of members, but I'm sure that wouldn't be a problem.

And yes...when you write LOL or LMAO, I know you're really laughing.

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