All This And A Truck Driver, Too!  

AtomicArtist0 45M
5236 posts
3/27/2006 12:04 am

Last Read:
6/28/2010 11:10 pm

All This And A Truck Driver, Too!

See the bald man with the fir coat peeking out from under his pirate shirt? His name is Skyking412004 and its his birthday. The reason I know this is because he insisted I dedicate something to him on his birthday. Me…Mr. Crass…Mr. Loaf-In-The-Pants…Mr. Funniest Blog Ever. What was he thinking? In spite of everything we all tell him, he doesn’t even have a blog for fear and insecurities that anything he’d write down not be up to par with any of us here. As if you need to be a literary genius to post anything here. Yeah right! He’s been hanging around here forever, we all know him and as I keep finding new ways to humiliate him, he keeps finding ways to come back for more. He must be a sucker for punishment which is probably why he asked me to do a birthday dedication…so here goes.

As he has no blog of his own , I have taken the liberty to write excerpts for him of things he might think about and as he claims he doesn’t have it in him to write anything reasonably well, here it is in the style of a fourteen year old girl. Enjoy.

March 24

Dear blog

I totally like star trek and smoking cigars. I’m sooo looking forward to my birthday coming up on like the 27th. Tee hee. Tonight I have a date with one of the blog girls on here. She’s soooo sweet. I totally want to have sex with every girl on here. LOL. Now that I have a blog, I can rake in all the hot girls just like all my friends. You know, my friends like Vick_Demise, MrNuttz05 and AtomicArtist. I’m totally nervous for my date tonight. I think I’m gonna rub one out in the bath tub, then put on my uniform. I heard a woman loves a man in uniform. I’ll tell ya about the big date later. Tee hee. LOL!


March 25

Dear blog
My date totally sucked ass! Cry! When I heard a woman loves a man in uniform, I didn’t know that didn’t include my Star Trek uniform. I thought I looked totally hot as Commander Data, but she didn’t think so. Maybe I should like double date with a buddy next time. That might work. Maybe I’ll ask MrNuttz05 to go as Jordi LeForge because he’s black and so is Jordi. LOL. Maybe I’ll ask him to go as Mr. Worf. No, girls like Klingons too much, Jordi would do just fine. I don’t want him taking all the attention away from me. Beautiful, hot me. I’m gonna go watch Dr. Who in my boxer shorts. Talk to ya later. Kisses.

March 26

Dear blog
Today I totally drove my truck and dropped off a big load at the dock. Then later, I dropped off a big load at the truck stop bathroom. Teehee! LOL! I sooo love it when I’m funny. I wish I was as funny as AtomicArtist. He’s soooo dreamy. I read his blog probably more than he does. How does he have time to write anything with all the girls he gets? I know what will make me happy! Maybe I’ll ask him to do something for me on my birthday. That would be totally hot! I would sooo drop a big load in my pants and I don’t mean the kind I drop off at the truck stop. Heehee. There I go being funny again. New Age music rules!


March 27

Dear blog

Today is my birthday. Yay me! I totally drove my truck today while listening to one of my Kitaro CD’s. I sometimes masturbate into a sock while driving. My truck is high up, so no one can see me bopping my baloney. Teehee. Sometimes girls in cars show me their boobies. I like being a truck driver! I have a date tonight with another blog girl. I know, two dates within a few days is a little weird for me. Ok, I’ve learned my lesson! Girls don’t like my Star Trek uniform, but I just finished reading the entire Dune series and I’m thinking they might like something like that instead. I’ll ask my buddy Vick_Demise to go with me as Baron Harkkonen since he has red hair. But what should I go as? I’ll totally figure it out later! LOL. First I’ll read everybody’s blogs and see what new things are in store for me. Talk to ya later. Kisses.

Ok, you get the idea. So here is what to do, as he doesn’t have a blog of his own, send your birthday wishes here since he hangs out here more than that weird unemployed guy at the comic book store. Or better yet, go to his profile. Avert your eyes away from the pictures of his squirting trouser-worm, and send your birthday wishes into his inbox. Especially all you men…big, hulking burly men with giant cocks. You girls, too if you want, sure but it’ll make him nervous to have so many men lurking his profile. It’ll be funny.

Skyking…I pick on ya cuz I like ya and you seem to take it so well. Happy birthday, buddy and get yourself a damn blog!

Vick_Demise 44M
2431 posts
3/27/2006 2:39 am


I agree about the part where you too should have a blog, but I am just happy to have you here as one of my friends! And I'll only go out as Baron Harrkonen if my oozzing boil kit is working, I hate it when my fx don't work!

I hope you have a great Birthday, B!

Atomic, it's all over now, now we all know you're a fourteen year old girl!

You can shine your shoes and wear a suit
You can comb your hair and look quite cute
You can hide your face behind a smile
One thing you can't hide
Is when you're crippled inside

AtomicArtist0 replies on 3/28/2006 5:34 pm:
Baron Harkkonen had oozing boyles? I didn't know that. i thought he has a big guy with red hear and had this tube going into his suit that enabled him to float and fly around. pretty cool character albiet probably gay as he enjoyed watching naked men wrestle to their deaths for his amusement. But who doesn't like that?

libgemOH 56M/52F

3/27/2006 4:42 am

Happy birthday to you Skyking!

And Atomic, you are one warped individual! I'd better keep my eye on you! -B

AtomicArtist0 replies on 3/28/2006 5:35 pm:
yes, you really should keep an eye on me. I close eye.

caressmewell 53F

3/27/2006 5:32 am

Happy Birthday Skyking

AtomicArtist0 replies on 3/28/2006 5:35 pm:
thanks for stopping by again

saddletrampsk 54F

3/27/2006 6:53 am

Happy Birthday get yer own blog..

AtomicArtist0 replies on 3/28/2006 5:36 pm:
yes...he needs his own blog

rm_art_persists 51M
1789 posts
3/27/2006 7:10 am

Happy bday skyking; you indeed need your own blog - at the very least to defend yourself.

AtomicArtist0 replies on 3/28/2006 5:41 pm:
at the very least to defend himself is right. he shouldn't be able to let me get away with this.

rm_cru1972 44M
4407 posts
3/27/2006 9:47 am

Happy birthday Skyking. I would send a mess to your profile, but alas I am just a lowly standard member. So Get your own blog!! Atomic you are a riot! rofl

AtomicArtist0 replies on 3/28/2006 5:43 pm:
yes! get you're own blog! and thanks. you win the war?

southrnpeach333 50F

3/27/2006 12:36 pm

Happy Birthday Skyking. You are like sooooo cool dude! You rock.

AtomicArtist0 replies on 3/28/2006 5:45 pm:

skyking412004 53M
5363 posts
3/27/2006 3:54 pm

_____Just a quick thank you to everyone, especially Atomic, since he loaned me this blog space. He said it costs way more than a spot on the Super Bowl, because he's famous and all. I've got a bunch of smart ass comments flying around in my head right now, but they can't get out through all the "happy tears" (sniff, sniffle,... sniff) I'm truly touched (and I don't mean in the head; that's a "given") T-H-A-N-K Y-O-U, Thank You, thank you.__________________
(I don't actually have a StarTrek uniform, as I haven't been able to find one retail in xxl. If anyone out there can sew, I would like one that looks like what they wore in "The Wrath of Khan". If it wouldn't cost an arm and a leg, I'd be willing to pay.)

AtomicArtist0 replies on 3/28/2006 5:51 pm:
"If it wouldn't cost an arm and a leg, I'd be willing to pay"

is that what you tell all the girls? I'm glad i could help and yes, this does cost more than a spot on the superbowl as I'm a big shot and all. Just leave payments once a month in a descreet brown envelope c/o AtomicArtist at the white apartment three buildings down from the flop house. Just look for the transexual prostitute named China Blue working the street. She's my bitch. Hung like a mule deer. Anyway, happy birthday to you. hope you had a great one. and get a damn blog!!

demonicsexkitten 41F
10671 posts
3/27/2006 4:51 pm

i'd go out with a guy in star trek uniform. but.. .that's just me. i'm a bit odd i guess.

Why doesn't skyking have a blog??? I got one automatically. I was posting for a few months, then suddenly "View my blog" showed up under my handle... after looking at it a few weeks i went to see what it was about, and there it was... a completely empty blog page. except ppl had viewed it. So i started writing. I'm surprised AdultFriendFinder didn't just give him one, "like it or not"....

and skyking: Happy Bday (again!)

AtomicArtist0 replies on 3/28/2006 5:54 pm:
"i'd go out with a guy in star trek uniform. but.. .that's just me. i'm a bit odd i guess."

skyking, meet demonicsexkitten. demonicsexkitten, this is skyking. work is done here. Now, can I watch you guys have geek sex in the holodeck?

rm_PurryKitty2 48M/49F
9753 posts
3/27/2006 5:15 pm

Happy Birthday!!!

Purry {=}


AtomicArtist0 replies on 3/28/2006 5:55 pm:
wow! you even wore a birthday tiarra for him. cool

ediesedgewick 57F

3/27/2006 5:28 pm

That Atomic...he's so thoughtful!

Happy Birthday Skyking!

Oooo. THAT was fun!

AtomicArtist0 replies on 3/28/2006 5:55 pm:
That Atomic...what a jerk!

TTigerAtty 62M

3/27/2006 7:14 pm

Happy Birthday, SkyKing! Does your niece, Penny, still fly around with you fighting the forces of evil?

AtomicArtist0 replies on 3/28/2006 5:56 pm:
um...are you talking about inspector gadget?

Looking4sex44240 54F

3/27/2006 7:43 pm

HAPPY BIRTHDAY SKYKING...I know it's almost over, I hope you had fun over the weekend.

AtomicArtist0 replies on 3/28/2006 5:57 pm:
whats almost over? his hairline?

mangomamiCT 41F

3/27/2006 8:37 pm


AtomicArtist0 replies on 3/28/2006 5:58 pm:

mm0206 68F
7767 posts
3/27/2006 9:45 pm

Mr B... you are the greatest guy on here ...well next to Atomic...

but we all love ya...hope the cake and kisses were worthy of another year....

tight hugs...

AtomicArtist0 replies on 3/28/2006 5:59 pm:
cake and kisses? damn! gimme some!


3/30/2006 12:54 am

EH, Fuckim, he never visits me anyways! I thinks he is afraid!

AtomicArtist0 replies on 3/30/2006 9:39 pm:
well...ya are kinda tall...oh, wait, that intimidates me, not him. He's like 6ft. hmmm...i don't know why he doesn't read ya.

skyking412004 53M
5363 posts
3/30/2006 7:55 am

_____I am making a public apology to HOTNBOTHERED for not visiting her blog. (Can't get much more public than on Atomic's blog.) I did not know she cared.-----and yes, HOTNBOTHERED, I am afraid. I am afraid of fantasizing about yet another gorgeous woman who lives too far away to have a relationship with. I think I'm not the only member on here who looks at you and quietly sighs inside. (a dark gift from the eltronic age)

AtomicArtist0 replies on 3/30/2006 9:45 pm:
oh boy, there goes skyking getting all drunk and having to apologize to everybody in the morning. I've been there before, brother. next thing ya know, you'll be down on the floor licking her boots. it always happens.

Looking4sex44240 54F

3/30/2006 8:09 am

When I wrote this his Birthday was almost over..Don't worry about his hair, he's very sexy

AtomicArtist0 replies on 3/30/2006 9:46 pm:
I never doubted it for a minute.

MrNuttz05 49M

4/15/2006 11:54 am

And two months later... My BLOG is really fuckin' up, dude, I HAVE MISSED A CLASSIC... Um... Happy belated birthday, dude... I know it was a month ago, but, hey, accept this tie & lets move forward, eh With friends like this.....?

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