Mistress vs. Wife  

AnnaDiorSF 40F
5 posts
3/9/2006 2:42 am
Mistress vs. Wife

During the past year there have been several stories about men who were married to highly desirable women, but were nevertheless not satisfied with these relationships. Mark Anthony left his wife who was a former Miss Universe; Mario Lopez did the same thing to a former Miss USA, Brad Pitt dumped Jennifer Anniston and Charlie Sheen spent $15,000 for a romp with a porn star even though he was married to the incredible Denise Richards. In addition, Halle Barre’s husband was addicted to on-line pornography, and Illinois Senate candidate Jack Ryan was apparently bored with his marriage to a top actress.

These events made me think about the BDSM world. Most men do not have wives or partners who are into BDSM. The reason they are visiting ProDommes is obvious.

If your wife or partner was a sexy dominant who was also kinky and creative and you would play on a regular basis would you still visit a ProDomme? If yes, would you let your partner know about these visits?

My feeling is that Dominance, like most other things in life can become boring if it is too repetitive and lacks excitement and newness. Part of the excitement of BDSM is the eternal quest for the "new and different." Every Dominant brings excitement to the game through Her unique approach. Part of the excitement is the anticipation of how a different Dominatrix is going to treat the sub - a certain amount of fear and anxiety adds a wonderful plus to any session.

My belief is that most men will still require occasional sessions with a ProDomme even if they are married to a Dominant Female. But first let us recognize that the very vast majority of Females are NOT Dominant. So to begin with, the odds of any male finding a permanent Dominant Female partner are very poor to begin with.

But in the unlikely event that a man did find a Dominant partner, most would still require an occasional "outside influence," that influence coming in most cases from a ProDomme. The odds of a man finding a Dominant Female to marry AND having Her share ALL his kinky interests are not good! Therefore he will still require some ProDomme's assistance.

Then there is another major factor: "Marital obsolescence." This means that regardless of how satisfying his marriage may be he still needs a "new thrill," a "new deposit into his fantasy bank," etc.

Personally, if I am in a relationship (or marriage) with a man, I would want him to share his fantasies with me. I am kinky enough to understand and/or apply them to life. I would never judge him, even if I hear the weirdest things. I like to have an exciting life.

I would not want his mind or body to be controlled by another Domme (unless I desire and give permission to be involved with others). I would consider it cheating if it is without my knowledge and approval. I would not appreciate him going around behind my back. The man I am with must be open with me, otherwise there is no point to be together. I am not just a traditional woman, I am a true Dominant, who also knows about love, loyalty, respect, etc.

Who knows, maybe with years my views will change, but now I know where I stand.

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