Aging  

Amazinglyintense 33M
30 posts
11/21/2005 10:29 am

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

Aging

Age has been a general guideline for the general population in an effort to establish some order, but in that generalization is a loss of individuality. It occurred to me during a moment of intense anxiety that I am desperately trying to grow up quickly. I am anxious to grow in my current company, to be done with schooling, to even age in body. But perhaps the problem is not in my character, but what I am expected to do by the general populace because of my current age. I am expected to be irresponsible and experimental in my activities. I am expected to be fool hardy, simple minded, and one tracked. I am expected to be dependent, thoughtless, and exist as an easily manipulated drone. And when I realized these expectations I understand why I am so desperate to grow up. I understand why there is silliness in my behavior and why my maturity may at times digress; I do not wish to be a victim of conformity. I am underestimated and unknown with a mind and heart full of dreams, hopes, passion, and most of all I seek truth and honesty. I am willing to venture out into the unknown, to put aside the safety of accepted sociological normalcy, but finding those open and willing enough to perhaps accept a young man who has been forced to grow in maturity because of adversity is rare. I am tired of mediocrity and accepted generalizations. I work all too hard pouring my heart into EVERYTHING that I do (as an athlete, scholar, worker, and lover) to be dummied down by the expectation of me being ill informed, ill prepared, and inexperienced. For lack of experience, I make up with enthusiasm and an otherwise unprecedented tenacity. Do not be so quick to judge a person by their age is what I have learned. Do not be so quick to judge me by my age is what I am trying to teach.


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