Alcohol Warnings  

AlbertPrince 57M
4459 posts
12/19/2005 7:37 am

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

Alcohol Warnings

Due to increasing products liability litigation, beer manufacturers have accepted the suggestion that the following warning labels be placed immediately on all beer containers:

WARNING: consumption of alcohol may make you think you are whispering when you are not.

WARNING: consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing like an asshole.

WARNING: consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell the same boring story over and over again until your friends want to SMASH YOUR HEAD IN.

WARNING: consumption of alcohol may cause you to thay shings like thish.

WARNING: consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe that ex-lovers are really dying for you to telephone them at 4 in the morning.

WARNING: consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what the hell happened to your pants.

WARNING: consumption of alcohol may make you think you can logically converse with other members of the opposite sex without spitting.

WARNING: consumption of alcohol may make you think you have mystical Kung Fu powers.

WARNING: consumption of alcohol may cause you to roll over in the morning and see something really scary (whose species and or name you can't remember).

WARNING: consumption of alcohol is the leading cause of inexplicable rug burns on the forehead.

WARNING: consumption of alcohol may create the illusion that you are tougher, handsomer and smarter than some really, really big guy named FRANZ.

WARNING: consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe you are invisible.

WARNING: consumption of alcohol may lead you to think people are laughing WITH you.

WARNING: consumption of alcohol may cause an influx in the time-space continuum, whereby small (and sometimes large) gaps of time may seem to literally disappear.

WARNING: consumption of alcohol may actually CAUSE pregnancy.



HOTNBOTHERED0414 46F

12/19/2005 7:54 am

I will not be consuming any form of alcohol, after my last night out getting drunk,lets just say, i tongued some chicks ass at a bar, went to an orgy,and ended up naked praying to the god of johns!!!!
So no more booze for me.....LOL


saddletrampsk 54F

12/19/2005 8:25 am

When I am loaded I am rich, good looking, bullet-proof and invisible..


Sister_Act_4_You 38F/38F

12/19/2005 12:23 pm

This is hilarious!

Also....WARNING: consumption of alcohol may cause one to put things into one's blog that they shouldn't....aaaiiieee.

Public Service Announcement: Friends Don't Let Friends Blog Drunk


SweetDarlinAngel 39F
2996 posts
12/19/2005 1:06 pm

Hey now Prince Al~

When I am a wee bit tipsy I find that I am not only graceful, well mannered and in good form but also quite lady like in my display of affection with the opposite sex.

Well that is if we ignore the fact that I am usually topless and dancing on the bar with married men screaming who wants to get rowdy?

All kidding aside, I think perhaps I should stick to club soda ... at least until after the family leaves for holidays

~SDA

~Angel


Kimmers777 106F

12/19/2005 2:00 pm

So much for "Alcohol - the other white meat."


silkysmoothlegs3 105F

12/19/2005 4:00 pm

Pmsl
ah well im missing out on all that fun
silky x


digdug41 49M

12/19/2005 7:15 pm

ROFLMAO oh how I dont miss those days this is gret al

roaming the cyber streets of blogland


oldman1776 78M
3164 posts
12/19/2005 11:02 pm

Very funny young man


DTduzDallas 50F

12/20/2005 5:13 am

*Friends don't let friends post drunk.


rm_saintlianna 45F
15466 posts
12/23/2005 3:28 am

Is the pic you?


AlbertPrince 57M

12/28/2005 1:59 pm

hotnbothered ~ sounds like a good night out to me

saddle ~ what's the point of being good looking if you're invisible

louisa ~ don't worry, there's nothing you can't say to me

SDA ~ nah, there's no point in staying sober

kimmers ~ i just use alcohol as a food replacement

silky ~ you don't drink???

dig ~ you just stay the way you are

oldman ~ thanks

dys ~ public, private, just do it

DT ~ thats what friends are for

stinky ~ I'll leave that to your imagination


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