The Canned Profile: Use if you wish!  

Aaarrrggh 44M
35 posts
11/28/2005 12:09 pm

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

The Canned Profile: Use if you wish!

Ever seen something like this?

I'm a down-to-earth, easy going person who is not judgemental, so I'm not a racist. I'm the kind person who is the epicenter of any good party. Hello! I love kittens and dogs, and roads that lead to nowhere as long as it's with the right person and we have lots of gas. Trephination is my kind of hobby! Is it yours too? I walk on the wild side like Lou Reed on a bender. Does this sound like you? I am a 'go-to' person with wants and needs and 5 dollars to my name. I'm shy at first, but once you get to know me, I'll fuck you all night, even if you die in the process from heart failure. I'm not looking to change my life, I just want to turn up the volume, maybe adjust the bass and the treble, and run it through a graphic EQ. When I'm at home alone, I'm miserable and lonely, and spend all my time on my computer, and avoid bathing like the plague. Speaking of the plague, I have that too! Does this interest you? Just to let you know I'm looking for a life-partner, not just a fuck-buddy, even though I have a picture of my ass on my profile, don't let that fool you--I'm really quite chaste.

What I need is an infallably gorgeous individual to take control my life, and perhaps buy me a new car. He/she must be honest, caring, and infallably gorgeous. Famous moviestars welcome. Must be in good shape, preferably at the Olympic level. Pathologists get special consideration.


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