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I woke-up this morning and found my home a bit on the cold side. I slipped on my maroon bathrobe and waddled my way over to the old stove in the living-room and fired it up. I grabbed the bench out from under my piano, slid it up close to the fire and took a seat. As I warmed my legs and feet I couldn't help but let my mind wonder as I studied the flickering fire.
I hear stories everyday of soldiers killed in the war and now, that daily bit of sadness has been magnified as a good friend of mine, her husband was diploid last Sunday. War, the complete combination of lunacy intertwined with honor and compassion. The act of killing to save lives.
I also wondered why my stupid cat wants to go outside in the cold and fart-around in the yard when he has food, water and warmth right here inside-Maybe it was colder in the house! I am also curious as to why he'll return an shit in the house(cat box)instead of the one-acre outhouse he patrols everyday!!!
I pondered the logic at which we are all here.
Loneliness, just horny?, Broken hearted or just for fun with absolutely no contact. I even questioned why anyone is here, Has it really become so difficult to meet people? Are we all so picky that we need a catalog of people to gaulk at instead of dealing with the reality that, even if you click with someone here-YOU WILL STILL HAVE TO MEET THEM IN PERSON ANYWAY! Have we become afraid of our own humanity? Is removing the nervous, "butterfly" sensation the easy way out of meeting and conversing with someone attractive in person?
I also thought about why we work so much and save our time off (retirement)for when we're old and too busted-up to the fun activities of our youth. What a stupid way of doing things. Of course I know the true answer but, in a fucked-up, happy little world, wouldn't it be nice to start working at fifty?
I scooted the bench back a few feet from the fire because my legs were starting to brown like a KFC drumstick. I leaned back on the piano dong............!!!! and chuckled a bit before my mind drifted off again.................
I contemplated how I can see a piece of my being in my grandfather's deep blue eyes while the windows to my soul are brown and green. How is it that I can "feel" that connection? Why is it that certain people like me can "feel" danger or something wonderful coming while others do not? What gifts of life were others given that I was denied and why?
Where was God standing when he created everything?
Why do some people say they only play the lottery or power-ball games when the amount of the prize is huge-How fucken arrogant is that? A million dollars to start isn't enough? stupid!
Why couldn't shit come-out in a brick-like (excluding the pain issue!) form and have a springlike scent so that we could do something productive with it? You know, build houses or bridges out of it. Instead, we spend billions of dollars and millions of man/woman hours to dispose of it, maybe the geneticists need to work on something other than deciding what sex people's children should be! A little gross but hey, my mind was wondering! Hey! don't look at me like I'm losing my marbles-everyone reading this, no matter how clean, how sophisticated-shits!
I also thought of a creature with little birdlike legs, massive feet like an ape, a huge yellow beak with razor sharp teeth, no arms and two eyes on tentacles behind the beak with "floating" cartoon-like eyebrows? Where the fuck that came from is beyond me!
For those of you that somewhat know me, this weird little post is no surprise, For the rest of you, I hope you enjoyed a trip through crevasses of the little grape between my ears!
11/12/2005 10:42 pm
I just love this daily-or not so daily dose of you..lol|
why haven't we chatted more ??
I welcome you to the House of Syn...
11/20/2005 3:48 pm