A Woman's Sexuality During Menopause  

4EverYoungFL 66M
54 posts
3/7/2005 8:40 pm

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

A Woman's Sexuality During Menopause

I have heard many confusing and conflicting thoughts about how women deal with their sexuality during menopause. It is of particular interest to me, since my wife (now 52) is in the early stages.

I have always had a higher sex drive than my wife. This has created some problems for us; but we have always been able to work them out. However, it is getting even more extreme now that she has started menopause.

I have heard recently that one of the best therapies for women in menopause is to have as much sex as possible. The more they have, the more they seem to overcome the symptoms of menopause and enjoy the pure physical pleasure of sex.

This seems to be the case for my wife. Although it takes some doing to get her "in the mood," when she does, she seems to be getting looser than ever and more willing to expand her sexual boundaries.

Do any of you have any opinions or information on this issue?

TramsRifleGeode 55M

3/8/2005 5:43 am

It's been a nightmare for me. My lady hit menopause around 45 (early). At first, it was the hot and cold flashes, then the various hormone therapies (we now know that was a bad thing)the weight gain (with low self image probs as a result. The fybromyalgia(sp?, though unrelated as far as we know, to menopause started making all physical activities painful. What used to be a pretty good sex life life has turned into uninspired "quickies" on special occasions. Patiece has paid off a little. After several years of trying different therapies, shes starting to get a little better. She can now talk sex without getting her defenses worked up. We have have finally had a non quicky (which we both enjoyed)with plans of more in the not so distant future. In the meantime, I recommend you take a LOT of extra time with foreplay, lots of kissing and reassuring her. and good luck

IPman 61M
313 posts
3/8/2005 5:59 am

At 50 my partner is starting to worry about her sexuality. It makes me sad to see her spend so much emotional capital worrying about losing her "female sexuality." I constantly remind her that our sex is better than it has ever been and that she is wonderful, sure it takes a little longer to get going, but good things come to those who wait. I hope you can appreciate that menopause is a VERY sensitive and difficult topic for a women, I think as men we need to always remind and support our partners how beautiful and sexual they truly are. Thats my two cents. Good Luck!

Merry49 61F

3/8/2005 12:21 pm

biblogger - I'm thinking the experience is different for each woman, but I honestly haven't read up on the subject. I can only relate my pesronal experience (see below).

IPman - Bravo, very well said. Your support of your wife in this matter is wonderful and as it should be.

I myself am a menopausal 49-year-old woman. I passed through "the change" quickly and easily last year. I think I had maybe a week of a few hot flashes and that was it. No pills, no therapy, no anything. I was certainly blessed.
My experience I suppose supports this theory of sexual activity diminishing the effects of menopause. I've always been a very sexual person, but in my 40s (and now nearly 50s) I feel my sexuality and sensuality grow each day. Due to my choice of two long-term partners the last 25 years, unfortunately much of much sexual activity was "self induced," and thus my resorting to AdultFriendFinder and other venues.

Any way, menopause did not seem to affect my sexual cravings one bit, in fact it may have further enhanced the cravings and the experience itself overall.

93 posts
3/8/2005 2:05 pm

Be patient, kind, supportive, lovable and flexable for the sudden changes she is going through. This in a strange kind of way is kind of like the opisite of going through puberty. She might not admit it but she needs you more now than in younger years.

saucy1956 60F

3/8/2005 2:41 pm

Just remember to engage her mind in your sex lives. Change the way you do things, not only in the bedroom but in your everyday lives as well. Its a new chapter in your lives; make it unlike any you've lived thru thus far. And for heaven's sake, if you fight, stop, look at her, walk up to her, and say, "I love you deeply. You are my wife, my lover, my friend." Caress her cheek, kiss her, and make love to her with your heart.

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