So that's what bad porn looks like...  

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1073 posts
12/23/2005 7:23 pm

Last Read:
3/12/2009 12:02 pm

So that's what bad porn looks like...


I have negative christmas spirit. Most years, I hover around indifferent, but for a number of reasons, this year I have some level of antipathy for the whole holiday thing (My friends usually think that my indifference is negative christmas spirit, but this year is definitely different).

That does not relieve one of the holiday shopping obligation, and so it was yesterday, and I accompanied my partner through the local mall. Eventually we ended up at the food court, which would normally be a low point in a trip to the mall, but at least it was an opportunity to people watch and park my butt for a bit. The food court has quite a variety of establishments, with a mix of locally owned places and national places/franchises. My partner wanted lemonade, so we went to one of the national places that actually specializes in freshed-squeezed lemonade.

(Note: because I am going to perhaps embarrass them on the web, I won't use their name. If you've seen them before, you'll immediately recognize them from the description. I will tell you that before I wrote this, I went to their website, and they're actually a pretty cool company with employee stock options, which for a fast food place, is really not bad...)

Other than the menu, the most distinctive feature of this place is their uniforms, shorts and polo shirts, in all of their multiple-primary color glory. However, they would be also-rans in terms of uniforms, were it not for the spectacular primary-colored hat. This is truly a sight to be seen, and I have to believe that you really must need a job to even ask for an application.

Anyway, as with any food court in a mall, a cloud of teenagers hovered around the counter, and behind the counter, three young ladies were handling the operational duties. What caught my eye was the one young lady towards the back of the serving area. She had a large bucket -- on the order of 20 gallons or so -- and it was filled with what I presumed to be ice and lemons, and that she was making lemonade. She was doing this with a metal implement that, when in this bucket, looked a lot like an old butter churn. Her task was to repeatedly squish/smash/break the contents of the bucket into some smaller units that would eventually become lemonade.

This young lady, who was reasonably attractive, took to her task with gusto, and rather than just moving the plunger up and down, decided to jump up and down along with the plunger. I was immediately reminded of a scene from the spoof "Kentucky Fried Movie" where they did a take-off on a porn trailer called "Catholic High School Girls in Trouble" complete with a clown with a whip.

Watching this scene, I could not contain my laughter -- fortunately my laughter was private enough that this young lady didn't think I was laughing at her.

I guess if I was working a minimum wage job, but I had stock options, I might jump up and down, too...

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