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GREAT ORAL SEX: Lesson 3 - Another Approach
GREAT ORAL SEX: Lesson 3 - Another Approach
Guide to Great Oral Sex
Another Approach to Oral Sex
I've discovered that while techniques for giving good oral sex are valuable, the best oral sex is administered BEFORE you ever go down on your lover.
Make sure that you start the "preparation " early in the day. Compliment your lover first thing in the morning. Hold her and tell her that you love/adore her. When you come home in the afternoon, or meet her on a date, bring a token of your affection, flowers, chocolate, a card, etc. Make sure to occasionally put some personal effort into the gift. Make your own card instead of buying one at Hallmark, pick wildflowers instead of grabbing roses. This can add a special touch to the gift. Do something that brings you two close together during the evening.
If on a date, take her dancing. Cuddle during a movie. Go for a walk, holding her hand. If spending a quiet evening at home, cuddle with a blanket while watching a rented movie. Offer to cook dinner, or do the dishes, or order a delivered dinner (pizza is nice, but restaurants deliver more "formal" dinners also!) Stop, and I mean STOP, and tell her how much you adore her, how beautiful she looks. Engage in conversation, and do most (or all !) of the listening. Encourage her to talk about herself and her day. PAY ATTENTION WHEN SHE TALKS ! Compliment her on efforts that she made to be attractive for you, such as her choice of clothing, her perfume, her hairdo. Lightly touch her hair or clothing while complimenting it. Look deeply into her eyes while complimenting her. And when the time is ripe, tell her that you want to honor her love, her femininity, her being.
Begin with kisses (check your breath first!). Kiss her cheek, her lips, one at a time, her chin, the curve of her jaw. Gently touch her cheek, her neck, run your fingers softly through her hair. Take her in your arms. Kiss her earlobe, the soft spot below her ear. Let her hear the passion in your breath. Whisper again how you want to honor her. Take your time through all of this. I cannot stress this enough. The longer you can sustain the early stages of this seduction, the greater her pleasure and satisfaction.
Do not undress her until she's ready. When I mean ready, I mean that she'll be either whispering to you to rip off her clothes or she'll be ripping her clothes off herself. Either way, again take your time. Spend a few more minutes kissing her neck and shoulder before sliding her blouse/dress off. After removing one or two articles of clothing, IMMEDIATELY move back up to her face, look into her eyes, and again tell her how much you love/adore her, and kiss her lips again. Begin kissing her cheek, her neck, and her chest. Let your fingers roam over her exposed skin, lightly brushing her bra, her panties, or other lingerie. DO NOT TOUCH HER GENITALS YET! Instead, let them simmer for awhile.
Continue to kiss and touch her body. Make your touches as light as possible, as if there's a layer of air between your fingertips and her trembling skin. Draw shapes on her chest, abdomen, back, and thighs. Lightly write "I love you" or your name, or draw a heart on her stomach. Kiss all around the edges of her bra. Move a shoulder strap down and kiss the exposed skin, the move the strap back up. Let your fingers wander just under the fabric around the edges, and under the straps, without touching the nipples. Let them explore about an inch under her panties.
Once she's trembling sufficiently, SLOWLY begin to remove the rest of her clothes. Take a good two to three agonizing minutes to slowly pull her bra's shoulder straps down and unsnap the bra snap. With the bra hanging limp, begin to explore the underlying skin, lightly pushing the bra away. Do not touch her nipples.
Give her lots of kisses AROUND her nipples, and along the lower edge of her breasts. Without touching the nipples, take the lower half of her breasts in your hands and lightly fondle them, taking their weight in your hands. After all, she's had to support them all day, and might appreciate your doing that job for a little while. Finish removing her bra (if she hasn't yanked it off herself). Move your hands down to her waist, applying kisses all down her abdomen, and begin the three to five minute process of inching her panties down over her hips, applying kisses to each delicious inch of exposed flesh.
Once her dripping wet panties are off, continue the foreplay. After a few seconds, she should be pushing you to her genitals again. Tease them some more, fondle and kiss her breasts as long as you can. When you think that she's dying for you to take her nipples into your mouth, keep her in that excruciating moment for a little longer (or even a LOT longer!) before finally satisfying her craving. Savor her reaction.
By now, she should be soaked. If not, continue with foreplay, kissing, hugging, caressing with a light touch, massaging her back. In fact, do this even if she IS wet! If she's screaming that she wants it NOW while hanging from the ceiling, then that's the cue that she's really ALMOST ready, but not quite, and needs even more caressing and kissing, especially around her crotch, the inside of her thighs, the back of her knee. Take her thighs in your hands and make a point to gently push them apart, admiring the spectacular view before you. Whisper to her that you're now ready to honor her.
As she moans, begin with kisses oh so close to her labia, along her pubic hair line (imagine one if she's shaved), and along that wonderful line between her thighs and her crotch. She will let you know that she's ready for direct contact by grabbing your hair and slamming your face into her labia. When she does, locate the folds between her outer and inner labia and run your tongue slowly up and down these folds. I like to go up one, then down the other, then reverse. Occasionally run your tongue between her inner labia also. Develop a slow rhythm for these strokes. I use full strokes completely up and completely down, about a second per stroke.
DO NOT touch her clitoris; it's still simmering at this point, and not ready for direct stimulation. You might also try gently kissing and sucking on the labia as a break, or insert your tongue into her vaginal canal, working it in and out for a few strokes. Use your hands to hold her "open", or use a well lubricated finger to lightly stroke her labia while kissing the area around it. Your hands can also wander over her body, fondling her breasts, stroking her thighs, tenderly running along her abdomen and sides, supporting her buttocks. If you feel that her moaning and breathing has increased, you might want to explore her clitoral hood a little with your tongue. Unless I know my lover prefers otherwise, I won't directly stimulate the clitoris, except maybe when she's in the middle of an orgasm.
The most important thing now is to relax, take your time, and not worry about "finishing". Remember, you're doing this for her. She'll let you know when you're finished. Do not pressure her into finishing at all; it's not only selfish, but will not allow her to relax completely. I won't even stop if she orgasms, for a female orgasm is not a "goal" or "end", but simply a high note in the symphony (think of a Shakespearean play, where the climax usually occurs during the third act, while the play continues for five acts). She may gently come "down" with the stimulation, or she may sustain the intensity. Either way, don't stop until SHE's ready.
Always keep tuned for feedback. You don't have to ask her questions and she doesn't have to talk (although that's perfectly okay if you're both into it). Just listen to her unspoken signals that you're doing something that she either likes or dislikes. Listen for moans, increased breathing, heavier breathing, arching of the back, trembling, her playing with her mouth or breasts, her biting her lips, her running her fingers through her hair. You can also ask later (when she's coherent) what she liked.
Happy Licking and Sucking!