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 | Blogs > Flaming_Litch > My Blog > The confessions of a torchered soul |
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Well, matters are just getting worse, and I'm not helping at all. I must really be a fool to let this happen from the beginning. My heart, torn asunder, aches for the return of the one I love but, that will never happen. Once, before I met her, my life was lonely. I kept to myself, never letting anyone too close so I wouldn't feel the pain that I feel now. I want to shut to doors once again but if I do then I will return to the life of seclusion I once had and be trapped in it for a very, very long time, perhaps another 17 years. I don't want that to happen but there is no other way for me to move on. My friend told me that if I do that then I'll just be locking the pain inside and one day, whether I'm with someone or not, it will come out 10 times stronger then it is now. He maybe right but I can't deal with this pain much longer. Even my music, that I dedicated my life too, seems to be leaving me. Is there no end to this? I have no one to go too for comfort. Sure there are those willing to lend an ear or a shoulder but that's not what I need. I need someone to love once again. But will that ever be possible again? I remember, when we first started dating, she used to say that she loved me all the time and I told her to stop and that the meaning of those 'three words' have lost their meaning over the years of evil people who will never understand their true meaning. And yet she kept on saying it. Everyday for almost 2 years. I know that when I said it I meant it. But now, it almost seems like it was just a game to her. *Sigh* Everyone says that she wasn't good enough for me and that she was too abusive to me. They maybe right but the fact remains that I want her back. To feel the warmth of her body agent mine. The feel of her warm breath on my chest. The softness of her voice in my ear. Oh how do I yearn to have that once more. One thing's for sure, I believe that I need help from someone who doesn't know much of me but knows exactly how I feel and what I am going through. Someone who could help walk me through this. But even that seems to evade me, even with the help of this sight. With that, I guess there is nothing to say but this.... Look at me My depth perception must be off again Cause this hurts deeper than I thought it did It has not healed with time It just shot down my spine You look so beautiful tonight Reminds me of how you laid us down And gently smiled Before you destroyed my life Would you find it in you heart To make this go away And let me rest in pieces (let me rest in pieces) Would you find it in you heart To make this go away And let me rest in pieces (let me rest in pieces) Look at me My depth perception must be off again You got much closer than I thought you did I'm in your reach You held me in your hand Would you find it in you heart To make this go away And let me rest in pieces (let me rest in pieces) Would you find it in you heart To make this go away And let me rest in pieces (let me rest in pieces) Would you find it in you heart To make this go away And let me rest in pieces Would you find it in you heart To make this go away And let me rest in pieces |
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10/15/2008 5:16 pm |
we need to talk,you have a very special gift that you just cannot loose,you will in time rest in peice but not in the way you think,if you let me i can help but first you must beleive again,,,,[in yourself]
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