my cialis debacle (you might wet your pants)  

12pups 54M
7 posts
6/16/2006 12:11 pm

Last Read:
7/25/2006 7:36 pm

my cialis debacle (you might wet your pants)


I just wrote this email to my two best lady friends. Upon rereading it, I started laughing and thought, "Surely someone else will be able to use this on stage. This is just too funny."

Oh, in a hurry? Skip down to the >>>>><<<<< marks!
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Hi girls!

(Geez, it's fun to write that!)

Just finished a long process of getting that Cialis prescription covered and filled. I'm writing both of you, because I think you'll both get a kick out of it.

It's a gdamn stand up routine just waiting for some comedian to get ahold of it. (Go to the bathroom right now, or you're going to pee your pants, I swear).

First, [**name removed**] -- THANK you again for the samples you brought me. Did you know the value of those things? You brought me $60 worth of max strength. My family doctor gave me the 10mg version (light stuff) and was surprised to have any left, because, apparently, for some reason, every time he goes to the sample cupboard, they're usually all gone.



The difference between Viagra, Levitra and Cialis is nada, at least in the way they work -- minimal difference. They all work with a protein that causes a restriction of vascular back flow, so the erection remains full strength.

But, they are "geared" to work at different rates:

+ Viagra goes to work fastest and lasts the shortest. It's pop, get 'er done, then limp.

+ Levitra is the middle of the road one. Pretty quick acting, but gives some time for spontaneity before fizzling out.

+ Cialis takes longer to go to work (min. 30 minutes), but it stays around for up to 36 hours. I don't think I got full 36, but I did get well over 24.

Only known side effects (which he questioned me about) were nausea (none noted) and blue vision ([my wife, Polly Purity] leaves lights out, so I have no idea). The blue vision is caused by a freak side effect of blood flow enhancement to the retina, increasing sensitivity to blue end of spectrum.

Now, he was not too concerned about me "obtaining" a sample ahead of time, if I had read the precautions. He didn't ask how I got them. I just said "A friend of mine loaned me a couple." He just hoped I'd been smart enough to read the little paper. Can't be on nitro for heart, and it would ruin a high BP regimen. But I'm on neither. The only thing he would have done different is test me for physical conditions causing the problem, which he immediately had stand and drop 'em to do. But, my testicles are healthy and fine (buttons popping over here), and my prostrate is normal, and my anus is very tight (he didn't say that... but shit, doc... lube up more! Good gawd!). Blood pressure very good. Went up slightly during prostrate exam, but pretty much returned to normal by now, though I'm still leaving to wipe off KY every once in a while to sit normal at puter without sliding off my chair everytime I hit return key.

General health, I've lost 20 pounds since last visit (all the sexercise, I suppose, and he made me set another short term weight loss goal and a long term weight loss goal); diabetes is well managed so I can stay a pilot without relicensure deferral for a couple more years; and I need to be getting even more sex... In case [Mrs. Pups] can't keep up, I have a prescription for more from any lovely lady friends I know.

...Okay. I made some of that up. Truth is, he limited me to just you two lovely ladies. Prescription specifically limits me to you.

(Um. Does cialis make the nose grow? We have nose growth going on over here...)

>>>>>Shorter version, start here<<<<<

Now, for insurance, that was a piece of crap. And here's where you are in danger of needing a change of shorts if you didn't take that pee break.

The prescription for 10 max strength pills was just under $120. And it has to be prior approved from BC/BS. So.. I'm in the pharmacy, squirming already, when I find out it's not approved. "Do you still want them?" The lady there, who already makes cracks about whatever meds I buy, is smiling funny, and trying everything to help *me and [Mrs. Pups] out.* Oh, how nice of her. Everything she does is getting me more attention and taking longer. I'm shifting weight from foot to foot and starting to want to hide somewhere. Her husband is working right then. Her son is working right then. And some gossip is working right then. Other people are starting to stand by me for their prescriptions.

Crap crap crap crap....

No go. So I go home thinking, let's just make the samples I have last a while. I'm in the camper, working on [office] stuff (and reading AdultFriendFinder blogs) when [Mrs. Pups] sneaks up to the screen and says "Boo!" I about had a heart attack. She's smiling and wants to know... well, guess...what do you think? Does she want to know my A1C results? No. She wants to know how much I told the doc and if I got a prescription.

(What the HELL happened to this prude? Where is the Puritan nun I've been living with. This can NOT be the same woman I was telling you about a month or so ago. Crap. Hey.... which of you called her? Wait.. you BOTH called her, didn't you???)

Anyway, she wants to know. So I tell her, it needs prior approval, and I tell her the cost, and we can just make the samples last. Nope. Without hesitation, she immediately says, "So call the doctor. Let's go. Get the approval." And she has a shitty grin on her face and is tucking her head down, lustfully.

Sheesh!!!!

She pulls me in the house and hands me the clinic #. Oh geez! I have to spell out c-i-a-l-i-s loudly and clearly to the receptionist b/c she pretends she didn't hear me and has never heard of this drug before (bitch... cruel, evil... all you women... evil evil comede-mons). She repeats the letters out loud back to me -- I'm guessing so the other receptionist, the nurses, the doctors and all waiting room patients can hear this. OMG!!!!).

I'm in another room at my house, shielding the remote phone with my cupped hand b/c my daughter is home and might hear me. My wife is sitting where she can keep an eye on my with her leg over the other and arms folded, intently following my end of the conversation, grinning.

Crap crap crap crap....

Then receptionist says, "No. We're not going to get tied up for 20 minutes on the phone here at the office. *You* will have to call BC/BS and get a form faxed to us. We'll fill it out and fax it back."

Crap crap crap crap....

So, I have to call BC/BS again ([Mrs. Pups] had me call them first to see if *I* could get prior approval... then the doctor's office). Wait wait wait...

[Mrs. Pups] isn't going back to work. She takes extended lunch now to make sure I see this through to the end.

That woman, the one at BC/BS, thinks I'm having an emergency. I don't know WHAT the hell she's picturing, but she rush jobs this. So she forgot to put my name on the form. And so now, online with me finally again, she's giggling and apologizing and asking, would I mind calling my clinic back to alert them that this is a form for *me*.

Oh Fuck! (Crap crap crap crap.)

I told her, no problem, and she's still got a giggle in her voice, apologizing, and ends with, "Have them write 'Rush' on the top, cuz I imagine you want this RIGHT NOW."

I know my face scrunched up at that. (Right now? Does she think I'm standing nude but limp right at the pharmacy or something? Is she thinking I need to hurry before someone trips over me and me and my wife in the drug store aisle?)

(What the fck, lady??? C'mon!!!!)

That's it. There's the whole story. So... Everyone in [my hometown] knows now that I'm a healthy boy with a dick that needs a brace and a wife who wants it NOW.

And I thought I'd share the facts about these pills with you, just because... well, I can't shut up about anything. I sort of just tell you everything, don't I. So why would this be different?

Love you!

Pups

rm_rsp54 58F
531 posts
6/21/2006 8:21 am

Great tale!!! Insurance companies are so fucked up!!! I could write volumes. Enjoy your cialis!!!!!


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